Most Useless Artifact In Your House

the dinner table.... we hardly ever eat there

aside from all the trash that's strewn about because i haven't been bothered to clean lately, there's the stack of vogue magazines that i refuse to throw out, a bunch of boxes full of crap that i refuse to throw out, and tons of other stuff. i really need to go through all my crap again...

My girlfriend never throws anything out! Not only does she keep everything she has ever owned but she loves to go to yard sales and buy other peoples useless shit. I have a 6 month rule. If I haven't used it in 6 months I give it to charity. Having said that...

the most useless thing in our house...the kids!

fake katana i got from a freind... no clue what the fuck todo with it. looks nice, not a bad edge on it... good for home defense. bah!

that, and a shit load of computer parts. like 7 computers.

just looking ot the left i see maybe 70 empty cd cases, 2 lamps that don't work, 3 yucky purses i never use... oh god, i know, it's the horrible pink and orange cat house that my gramma bought me. it takes up half the room, is god awful, and the cat is afraid of it.

I have a shit load of magazines I can't seem to get ride of...

In my frat house... a gavel stolen from the Smithsonian.

i have about 600 albums... and i haven't had a turntable for like 15 years.

Steak / meat mallet?

thats exactly what it is....anyone see "Spike of Bensonhurst"...there is a neat scene where they tenderize his hands with one of those.

Me

I've got a box full of old pants with 30-inch waists...as if I'll ever be able to wedge my fat ass back into those fuckers!

My master's thesis, maybe? I don't know who the pretentious prick was who wrote it, but I can't even read the damned thing. In fact, I'm not entirely sure what it's about. I am pretty sure that my name is on the title page, though, so it must be mine.

Linky no worky.

A darth Vader helmet.

my engagement ring from my first fiance, I threw in the garbage at 31 flavors. my other one and wedding rings i haven't done anything with. I might keep them.

I also have an old 386 tower in my hallway for the last 3 years.

A morning-star (as in the medieval weapon... present from a friend )