stupid injuries

I just gave myself a fairly insignificant, yet painful, stupid injury. I decided I wanted some stove-popped popcorn, but put too much in the pan and while I was shaking it, the corn forced the lid up a bit and a popping kernel popped more kernels up into my sleeve and burnt my arm! After I was done swearing I could stop chuckling.

Other stupid injuries I've given myself:

Fell off of the Hamburgler toy while drunk and sneaking into a McDonald's play land in high school. Broke my arm.

Broke my collar bone when my ex opened the trap door to my loft room into my chest while I was coming up stairs.

Dis-attached retina from a snowball fight in high school. Most painful thing I've felt in my life.


Looks sick huh? What stupid things have you done to yourself?

[Edited on Jan 06, 2005 by Samebeat]

One time I was sitting in the car with my then boyfriend and he pushed in the cigarette lighter for no apparent reason. It didn't ever pop out and I told him that they don't work with the car off. He said that they did. I said that they didn't. He said that they did. I took it out, looked at it, then put my thumb on it to prove a point. I had a spiral burn on my thumb for weeks.

Moral of the story, the cigarette lighter works with the car off.

[Edited on Jan 06, 2005 by inkncarrots]

It was back in '88 I was 9. My family was moving into our first new house, built just for us. My parents took me and my two brothers, 7 and barely 2, with them to Sears to pick out some appliances. Well you see this particular Sears had one of those Nintendo game testing stations that they thought could occupy us for the needed time. Unfortunately for them it was out of order. So myself and my brothers bored out of our skulls decided that just wandering around, playing tag and the like in the department store was good enough for us. After that got a bit boring, we discovered the escalators.

Oh Joy of Joys.

WE went up and down them for an age. Then we went down the up oone and up the down one. Then I realized that we could just sit down on them and slide right off the end. Now remember this was '88, spandex was teh coolest clothing around.

So here I am sitting on down two steps lower than my brothers on an escalator wearing a pair of black bike shorts with a red stripe down the side. I come up to the end and get SUCKED RIGHT IN[.

I can see my parents about thiry yards or so ahead as I strain to pull myself out of the grinding workings. My two brothers are using their recently acquired going up the down side skills to keep from crashing into me. My parents make it to me just as I finally extricate myself from the diabolical machine.

My favorite pair of shorts were ruined.

And that is why I have scars on both cheeks of my ass from an escalator.

I've also a cool comet over my abdomen from getting the end of a pair of handlebars jammed into my stomach after completely botching an attempted jump down a dirt ramp.

"That could've been easily avoided had some parent-- I don't care
which one-- But some parent conditioned him to fear and respect that escalator!"

[Edited on Jan 06, 2005 by inkncarrots]

For the record this was about ten years before Mallrats. That said, I laughed harder than anyone when I saw that part.

i worked in an Air Traffic Control Tower and to get out to the catwalk you have to go through a very small door...when I was going out I hit my head on a hinge. I had to get 3 stitches...because of me they now have warning signs

I broke my own leg trying to throw an empty beer keg. I win.

I broke my femur (the hardest bone in your body, next to the skull) falling down a hill. I win.

oh, and I broke my elbow jumpng from the bed of a moving Dodge Ram that was going 25 mph.

When I was a kid, my dad had these safety harnesses for the back seats in the car. For one reason or another these were left around the house. They were bright orange four point things.

Now, being a kid living in cloud cuckoo land, I thought these would make an excellent parachute harness (think Luke Skywalker in his Snowspeeder pilot outfit). All I needed was a 'parachute'

Hello Bannister!

After tying one of these harnesses around myself and the other to the bannister, I jumped.

I can remember not being able to breathe, then getting unhooked by my mum. Followed by lots of crying.

Almost dying is an 'injury' right?

{edit - spelling and stuff.}

[Edited on Jan 06, 2005 by Jerry_Coke]

I broke my finger trying to crack my knuckles before a piano recital.

[Edited on Jan 06, 2005 by Sorcha]

when i was three i was standing on the kitchen counter. i fell. i'm sure it was somehow caused by my brother but i don't remember. i split my lip. the long way. it looked like i had two lower lips sewn together.

in high school i punched a wall while playing basketball. i don't remember why, but it had to be a stupid reason. twenty minutes later i notied it hurt to catch the ball.

I opened a frozen pizza once, tossed down the knife I used to cut open the plastic a bit too hard, it hit the frozen pizza, bounced back at me while spinning, hit the top of my hand between two of my knuckles and cut it wide open.

Between two of my knuckles, it was split wide open and I could see blood vessels and tendons and whatnot moving around. It even nicked a tendon and cut halfway through it which put me in a hand-splint thing for a few weeks while it healed to prevent it from snapping. I obviously needed stitches.

The damage was surprising considering how weakly I tossed down the knife.

I once slammed my own head in my car door. Damn near knocked myself out, gave myself a black eye.

I wasn't looking and bumped into one of my Drill Instructors. He left a facial scar.

I'm always scared that kind of shit is going to happen to me. Thank you for confirming my fears.

"Sir, watch where the fuck you're going, Sir"

My most persistent stupid injury is bumping my head on ceilings, doorframes, and lightfixtures, then yelling about the poor placement of said archetectural features.

I have a couple of cigarette burn scars due to drunken stupidity. We gave ourselves Germs circles on our wrists, not because we even liked the Germs, but because we were "punk fuckin' rock" and very drunk. The other is on my shoulder, about the size of a quarter, and was inflicted by my former roommate, again thanks to alcohol.

Got my hand jammed in an automatic credit card imprinter...broke three fingers trying to get my hand out.

Knocked myself out by walking into a hanging parking lot sign while on a date.

Broke my wrist trying to run across the monkey bars.

Bent down and caught my ass on a garbage can...broke my tailbone.

Fractured my skull and broke my back when the mast from a fishing boat collapsed (I ran under it instead of away from it).

There are more but I'm afraid I'll come off as somewhat awkward...


And sadly all of these have happened since I finished highschool.

This weekend while I was making myself a little desk extension/bookshelf for myself, I was quickly running a piece of plywood across the table saw. I thought it was through all the way, but at the last second the wood caught, ripped out of my right hand, flew against the fence (breaking it) and then ramming into my left arm, hard. It broke the skin through my jacket, and I reckon if it hadn't hit the fence first it would have been a lot worse.

Knee'd myself in face. Split my bottom lip open from corner to corner. Yeah it hurt.


EDIT*****

I also knee'd myself in the eye and gave myself quite a shiner.

[Edited on Jan 06, 2005 by Slickwill5]

I just cut my nose playing with a pocket knife. Goal!