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MisterJesus

MisterJesus

United Kingdom
November 2002

JUL 15, 2004 03:00 AM

Druid arrested for carrying a spell-casting sword into hardware store. Police still on hunt for Ranger with +2 Chain Mail.

A BRITISH druid was in in court and charged with carrying a ceremonial sword, used for casting spells, while on a shopping trip to a local hardware store.

Merlin Michael Williams appeared at a magistrates' court in the southern English coastal town of Portsmouth wearing his full druidic regalia of green robe and blue cloak, with talismans around his neck.

The 26-year-old was charged with possessing an offensive weapon after a security guard saw him with the sheathed 90cm blade draped over his shoulder as he browsed through a branch of Wilkinson Hardware.

About a dozen fellow members of the Insular Order of Druids sat in the court's public gallery, while chief druid King Arthur Pendragon, wearing white robes with a red lion emblazoned on the front, acted as Williams's legal adviser.

The sword, named Talisen, has been confiscated by police as evidence

Zoop

Zoop

Sun Prairie, WI
March 2004

JUL 15, 2004 03:03 AM

When LARPers Attack!!

inabsentia

inabsentia

Missoula, MT
December 2003

JUL 15, 2004 03:09 AM

How can the police expect to shop without my ogre-slaying knife (+5 against ogres)??? I need my safety, goddamnit!

HyenaHell

hyenahell

I'm lost
April 2003

JUL 15, 2004 03:20 AM

i don't know if this is funny, sad, or just inane...

ChezGeek

ChezGeek

Port Orchard, WA
January 2004

JUL 15, 2004 03:28 AM

thunderbolt, thunderbolt, thunderbolt!!!

matt_organic

matt_organic

United Kingdom
September 2003

JUL 15, 2004 03:48 AM

Yes! Yes! Yes! This is classic! Not least because he named his sword with a bard's name. What a tosspiece. Yet further incentive for me to form my PAOPTWGUABN organisation.

(N.B. Pagans Against Other Pagan Twats Who Give Us A Bad Name)

Coliwali

Coliwali

I'm lost
February 2003

JUL 15, 2004 03:53 AM

So, wait, this isn’t an onion piece!? So, weird.

fiendish

fiendish

USA
December 2002

JUL 15, 2004 03:58 AM

dumb...

pabbott_03301

pabbott_03301

Auburn, ME
February 2004

JUL 15, 2004 03:59 AM

Jeezum! I'm glad I don't live in Britain. And they think us Americans are strange? Don't know what is worse, the druid for running around in that funny getup, or the police for arresting him. Chill out folks.

TheAngus

theangus

Raleigh, NC
January 2004

JUL 15, 2004 04:42 AM

that rules. it made me chuckle.

Southuhn

Southuhn

San Diego, CA
February 2004

JUL 15, 2004 05:57 AM

From: King Arthur Pendragon
To: The Knaves at Work on This SuicideGirls.com Witchery

Verily, beware, for I shall smiteth thee with my Man-Slaying Sword (+12 against humans) if ye continue to insult the Holy Insular Order of the Phoenixicorn!

By the way, dost thou thinkest Poe would be my girlfriend?

Pihka

Pihka

SUICIDEGIRL

Finland

JUL 15, 2004 06:48 AM

Hey folks, I´m a bard. Come to my journal to snigger and I´ll show you some thunderbolts. skull

lamdalamdalamda

lamdalamdalamda

Chicago, IL
February 2003

JUL 15, 2004 07:12 AM

misterjesus, you get +3 on all saving throws for the rest of your life!

inkdrinker

inkdrinker

Denver, CO
May 2004

JUL 15, 2004 07:28 AM

Misterjesus gets -1 to all saving throws for stealing his headline from Fark.

_Sarah_

_Sarah_

Kalamazoo, MI
January 2003

JUL 15, 2004 07:31 AM

He was in ceremonial regalia specific to his religion. The D&D jokes are lame.

Granted, he probably should have known better and left the sword in the car.

germ13

germ13

United Kingdom
September 2003

JUL 15, 2004 09:12 AM

pabbott_03301 said:
Jeezum! I'm glad I don't live in Britain. And they think us Americans are strange? Don't know what is worse, the druid for running around in that funny getup, or the police for arresting him. Chill out folks.


What makes druids strange? It's an ancient religion not dissimilar to that of the Native Americans skull

Deathhippie

Deathhippie

San Diego, CA
April 2003

JUL 15, 2004 10:09 AM

Wow, sad display of intelligence. I suppose it is easy to make fun of things that are not seen normally?

Agreed its stupid to carry a sword (cerimonial or not) into a public place, but it is a sacred part of some peoples beliefs. (no they don't kill cats with them)

lamdalamdalamda

lamdalamdalamda

Chicago, IL
February 2003

JUL 15, 2004 10:35 AM

germ13 said:

pabbott_03301 said:
Jeezum! I'm glad I don't live in Britain. And they think us Americans are strange? Don't know what is worse, the druid for running around in that funny getup, or the police for arresting him. Chill out folks.


What makes druids strange? It's an ancient religion not dissimilar to that of the Native Americans skull



...and besides, there are a number of things in american christiandom that would give one pause. am i going out on a limb here?

Southuhn

Southuhn

San Diego, CA
February 2004

JUL 15, 2004 11:17 AM

Deathhippie said:
Wow, sad display of intelligence. I suppose it is easy to make fun of things that are not seen normally?

Agreed its stupid to carry a sword (cerimonial or not) into a public place, but it is a sacred part of some peoples beliefs. (no they don't kill cats with them)


It's stupid to expect to be allowed to walk around in a store carrying a weapon, and it's stupid to steal all your names from The Sword in the Stone. If they want me to treat them as legitimate, they can act legitimate. As it is, they've named themselves for a dead religion and a bunch of mythological characters and gone around ACTING like overzealous D&Ders.

Amelia

Amelia

SUICIDEGIRL

Kentucky, USA

JUL 15, 2004 11:40 AM

He must have BOTCHED his reality check!

d20

d20

San Francisco, CA
September 2003

JUL 15, 2004 12:00 PM

1) damn you inkdrinker for being quicker than me to call shenanigans on the Fark stealing. several hours quicker no less.

2) other religions carry cerimonial weapons in public Southuhn, though i do agree that these guys are a bunch of tards.

3) damn Lawful Good cops and their rules. pfff.

limbictides

limbictides

Richmond, VA
September 2003

JUL 15, 2004 12:10 PM

Deathhippie said:
Wow, sad display of intelligence. I suppose it is easy to make fun of things that are not seen normally?

Agreed its stupid to carry a sword (cerimonial or not) into a public place, but it is a sacred part of some peoples beliefs. (no they don't kill cats with them)



It's just an easy target. Most things should be made fun of at every opportunity, and this one is golden. ARRR!!!

anger_frog

anger_frog

I'm lost
January 2004

JUL 15, 2004 12:21 PM

If I recall correctly, there was another news story recently about ANOTHER druid being sought for murder charges in the UK; I clicked the link thinking it was the same guy. Did anyone read that one?

HarryNash

HarryNash

I'm lost
May 2004

JUL 15, 2004 01:45 PM

at the rate of skill drop when imprisoned in Marrowind, how will he ever reach level 13 to challenge for leadership of the grove?

_Sarah_

_Sarah_

Kalamazoo, MI
January 2003

JUL 15, 2004 02:27 PM

If this is a News story, shouldn't the original "article" NOT read like fan-fic? Are we reporting news or going out on a limb to make fun of a religion with
'ranger' and '+2' comments? whatever

Classy. Real classy.

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