What *can't* you do?

Little things that I can't do but bug the shit out of me:

I can't for the life of me open an envelope like a "normal" person. Every time I try to just get it open, it gets all torn and ragged looking and I feel like The Worst Envelope Opener Ever.

Can't cartwheel. Never have, prolly never will. I've done backflips, handsprings, and all that crap, but can't cartwheel. WTF?

And dude. I can't fucking whistle. I think it's my buckteeth. People think it's really weird when they find out that I can't whistle, and then they whistle their hearts out right in front of me and I feel mocked.

So...what can't you do?

I can't make farting noises with my armpit using my hand. It almost ruined my childhood. Luckily I was double-jointed and could pop my arm and various fingers out of socket.

I can't close one eye

Teleportation. Gotta work on the teleportation.

I could never magic eye...and no, I am not going for Mallrats joke, I seriously could never magic eye.

I could never do this bird call that all my friends were able to do.

I could never grow my hair longer than my pictures show it...cause if I do...it turns into a fro...

I can't polygon mesh model...yet...here is hoping I get that down soon.

i can't stay away from this place...

i have a hard time farting discreetly when it's most neccessary.

I can't whistle.

Try a letter opener. You'll avoid papercuts and the envelope will look much nicer afterwards.

Cartwheeling is not my forte, either, and I was a multisport athlete in high school, so don't feel so bad.

Try inhaling while you whistle instead of exhaling and/or using your fingers. It may not be as loud, but it works best for me.

Good luck.

I can't do any kind of strenuous physical exercise without my lungs feeling like they're on fire.

God, I hate asthma.

dammit man! when you have a setup that perfect you should just let people run with it!

It's terrible. I even started whistling when I read this post, and then felt all bad

I can't do the armpit fart thing, I can't turn my eyelid inside out though I always wanted to be able to, I can't do a cartwheel either, and I certainly can't do anything that involves double-jointedness.

I can't whistle really loud.

Well, I mean my results *without* a letter opener. I watch other people open envelopes (w/o the letter opener) and I wonder why mine always look unruly. These are just little things that shouldn't and prolly don't matter to anyone but it bothers me.

As for the whistling, the finger thing doesn't work either. Thanks though.

when on the internet (email anything) i cant use correct punctiation or grammar and i tend to have run on sentances some times but not all the time and my spelling is bad too sometimes.

grow sideburns

me neither.

i cant stand on my toes either. if i try to i get some horrid pain in the arch of my foot.

drive

whistle

snap my fingers

understand basic geography

hold onto a piece of paper (including money) without folding it up a billion times and ripping it to shreds

I can't get on my computer without typing in "www.suicidegirls.com" in my browser.

That, and I could never do the whistling thing while sticking 2 fingers in my mouth - this used to bother me quite a bit.

:takes a second to hide money:

i can't dunk a basketball... and it eats me up inside that i can't. mainly because i'm *less than an inch* from pulling it off.

i also cannot whistle.

i can't catch a chicken
i can't drink a beer without tearing up the label (no, it happens even when i'm getting plenty of action)
i can't olly a skateboard
i can't grow decent facial hair (not that i want it, it would just be nice to know i could)
i can't finger whistle, this has always irked me

I can't tell my right from my left. At least not instantly. I have to stop and think about it.

It can be pretty embarrassing.

I can't swim. But I can whistle like a mad mofo.