Q.Basically my boyfriend never wants to have sex and it confuses me. I wear sexy outfits, corsets, thongs, nothing but a skirt, fish nets stockings, but nothing works. I rub on him, even give him head, but he still doesn't want to have sex with me. I don't know what to do!!! Any tricks you could teach me?
A: Firstly, you need to know it's NOT you. Wearing sexy outfits, lingerie etc., will only do so much. I am sure you look amazing!
It sounds like you have a real problem in the relationship here, I don't think trying any tricks will help. How long has he been this way? Has he always been less sexual than you? Sometimes guys just are not sexual, despite the stereotype.
The first thing I think you should do is confront your boyfriend on this issue, but be kind and be gentle, this is a sensitive subject. I know this is frustrating and can do serious damage to your confidence and self esteem, but please try not to take it personally and please don't think you're not hot enough and can't "do it" for him.
He should be willing to go to a doctor and have a few tests done, he may have a medical problem. He may have low testosterone, (you might want to Google that and see if he has other symptoms). He may have erectile dysfunction, which he can get pills for (Viagra and others). There may be a lack of blood flow to his penis, etc. It's important to rule any physical factors out for his health.
Once you have ruled out anything physical, author possible causes could be emotional or mental. Has there been a change in the relationship or a change in his life? Could he be stressed, tired or overworked? Are you guys okay besides this sex problem? It may help him to talk to a therapist. You guys could even consider going to couples counseling together.
Basically, this doesn't usually happen for no reason. Sure, some men and woman are just not very sexual, but there is usually a reason beyond that, especially if it hasn't always been this way. You need to work together to get to the bottom of it, and you need to be supportive as I'm sure this is going to be a little embarrassing for him.
If he is not willing to seek any kind of help, you need to decide if you will be happy spending the rest of your life in a sexless relationship. Personally, I wouldn't be so hurt that my boyfriend wasn't having sex with me, I would be much more hurt if he wasn't willing to try and do something about it.
Personally, I wouldn't be so hurt that my boyfriend wasn't having sex with me, I would be much more hurt if he wasn't willing to try and do something about it.
What do you do if you really don't like sex? Don't date.
Saying "you're cute and all, and I really like you, but I don't want to get naked together" while true, just doesn't fly, so I avoid the whole situation.
Unrelated note: I'm curious why they are using your photo from the set we shot as promo for this when they didn't even buy the set? That seems a bit wrong to me. The set isn't even on the site any more! haha
Leandra
SUICIDEGIRL
California, USA
OCT 01, 2012 07:03 AM