NEWS: Confessions Of A Reluctant Dater: The Jake Ryan Theory

So women can't think for themselves and only do what they have learned in movies.
Gotcha!

Whew. Happy to know I no longer need to take responsibility for my shitty choices in life. And that it can all be boiled down to watching Sixteen candles and I assume Grease, as well.

And to think I actually paid to go to therapy at one time when I all I needed to do was stop watching movies.

I have a sudden urge to eat kettle corn and listen to Alanis Morissette.

I also would love to know how and why your writing style, tone, and voice changed in less than a month. It's like a completely different person is writing these.

I dunno, I heard about half of a Taylor Swift song last week and I ended up feeling sorry for the guy it was about... because she didn't make it sound like she was an easy person to be dating. Haha. It's all perspective. That's why I liked that Goyte song, FAIR AND BALANCED.

I'd say it's more likely other attractive features about a guy just make it easier to ignore the douchey ones. I remember Angelina Jolie in hackers being kind of a bitch, but it was easy to ignore because it was a movie and she was just really really hot. Attraction is weird for everyone. I'd say that usually I don't find myself attracted to someone if they have an ugly or incompatible personality, but just sometimes I do. The key is to listen to your brain, which took me some practice.

Bradley, you deserve a hug and an award for this. The other side of course is that nice guys are not considered a commodity. They spend every relationship wondering why the laws of physics are so F'd up.
Here's to producing movies where the douche bag gets dumped! Cheers!

Indeed.

There is no Shermer in Illinois!

The non-Jake Ryan guy (meaning me) hopes that a lot more women finally have this epiphany! Thanks for sharing! :-)

It's a John Hughes comedy. Anyone looking for their ideal anything in that movie only has themselves to blame for not getting that it's a comedy.

That pull-up scene? Classic sight gag, not douchebaggery.

And if I recall, Jake Ryan was probably the nicest guy in the movie. That movie is filled with assholes and idiots, because it's a comedy, and assholes and idiots are funny.

i love sixteen candles. also, the breakfast club. but that's just 'cause i always had a crush on molly ringwald. but you're right, we totally condition our little girls fall for douche bags. we also fail to teach our little boys how to treat little girls. and worse yet for many that do learn when they're young struggle with being ignored for so long that they grow up and pay some tool to teach them how be a douche so's they can pick up girls. it's a sad state, but the first step to fixing it is to acknowledge it.

This. Also, "you" didn't grow up with these films. "You're" way too young. With so many great writers on SG, why are these trite pieces of garbage still being run?

-Confessions of a reluctant member

Girls do like assholes because they think they can try to change them or they take the "thrill" they offer.

I'm a nice guy but I've tried to do a nice mix of being nice and being an asshole in a sarcastic way. Being nice is just to boring.

I dont think a full out nice guy will ever win. there has to be a mix of good and asshole. that's just how i see it

Just thought I would point out that I myself grew up on these movies, and before you say I am too young my mother who is 58 didn't let us watch recent movies. We got black and whites like Nosferatu. I don't think age has anything to do with it hotcurry.

aside from that I agree about the Jake Ryan idea of this article. yes while it is a comedy they are portraying him as the HUNK, the guy to have etc.. they never show a truly nice and romantic side to him. He is simply the douche bag. Remember in Pretty in Pink the nicest guy in the world Ducky who always has molly ringwald's back and is always encouraging her in everything she does, well he never gets anything but heartache all the while the HUNK gets the girl even though he was mean to her, let his friends talk shit about her, and then after seeing how pretty she looks says some sweet words so he can go to prom with her after all.

Jake Ryan is not the only asshole in the movie. Most of the characters are pretty douchey, and John Hughes was pretty good at depicting the frequently mean-spirited and shallow, and occasionally romantic nature of the teenager.

look at every popular male sex symbol and there's definitely a dose of douchebag there.

Yeah, but Duckie fits the classic 'nice guy' meme. He's only been being nice to Andie (Molly Ringwald) because he wants a romantic relationship. When he tries to cash in the 'nice guy points' he feels he's been earning, and she shoots him down, he goes mental.

Granted, at the end of the movie, Duckie does semi-redeem himself.

Yes, it's true. Good guys are not a hot commodity. We are often not flashy, super risk takers. We often tend to be steady, thoughtful and calm. Not necessarily what many young women (or men) are looking for. Later in life we can be more ppreciated. I am lucky that I was persistent and caught K_Rex's heart early on, so i didn't have to wait 15 years.

Some girls just aren't worth being with.

They want the asshole guys, let them have them. Helps us pick out the sane girls from the ones just looking for a thrill.

Well women think it's more than okay to bash slim models in magazines/the magazines themselves for influencing girls at an impressionable age (and women of all ages). Clearly women have a degree of autonomy over their own lives but they learn from somewhere. I don't see much difference between that and what Bradley has said.

Damned for writing poorly last month, damned for improving this month.
I thought this article was written in a more realistic voice and written well. Props to Bradley for the improvement.

If you are wondering why I have only picked your particular comments to respond to LaceyK, it's nothing personal and I realise others have agreed with you/said much the same thing. Your comments were just first.