Mysterious Drunken Injuries

Alright, so I woke up with a fat lip, blood on my shirt, and my knuckles a little torn up. And I have NO IDEA how they all got that way. Damn martinis. Any thoughts?

You got in a fight after too many martinis. How very "Swingers" of you.

That was a low blow. But the fact that I made it home with my big bag of hair dye and other crap makes it even more gay.

Be happy at least your knuckles are torn, eans you got a shot or two in. Unless you skinned them falling down after running into a fist.

I have a pretty deep and painful cut inside my left ear from the other night. I can't imagine how I managed to get wounded there. Hurts like hell though.

my pal ryan threw himself through a window and ran down the street naked, tripping & falling, and rolling about 15 feet. this was after he ingested an entire bottle of johnny walker red. we carried him back to the house (bleeding & almost entirely scraped up) and put him in his bed where he passed out.

the next morning he had no idea what happened, he was like "why am i all scratched up??"

this isn't an injury, but while i was drunk this summer, i ate a jar of pickled herring and woke up, smelled my fishy digits, and came to the conclusion that i had sex that night. i thought this for three days, then i remembered eating the herring.

boo-yah!

Years ago my buddy fell down both sets of stairs at this club called the Warehouse. Fell down the first flight of stairs, stood straight up and careened backwards down the second set. He stood up and walked away.

The next morning he called me up and asked it he was in a fight the night before because: "dude, I look like someone opened up a can of ass on my face".

At least you stayed away from the window. You could have been this guy.

[Edited on Feb 06, 2004 by obd]

R.B.I's - Random beer injuries...man those are tons of fun...

Whoa! How did I miss this? Good explanation though. I must have been drunk too.

I wasn't aware of it untill my buddy Jay peeled me off the sidewalk.

I've broken my fingers, my nose, and torn ligaments in my ankle while intoxicated and have no recollection of any of these thing happening. But I was told each injury was pretty funny for those who remember what happened.

I recall stumbling into a hotel bathroom only to slice the bottom of my foot , and not realize it until the puddle of blood became about a foot wide.

I have a fantastic rug burn

I pretty regularly find bruises that have no explanation. No alcohol needed, though.

I think that's called Being A Housewife syndrome. Check your fingers for rings.

Waking up on your living room floor wrapped in only a duvet, your apartment completely flooded, and slightly covered in your own vomit, with only a dusty recollection of nights previous isn't really an "injury" is it? Well, only to your pride.

Waking up wearing only boxers that aren't mine, between 2 guys I don't know, in a room that does not look familiar. I suddenly became very aware of my rectum, and was trying to assess whether or not my anal virginity was still intact. I think that qualifies as a near miss on a potential injury (physical and mental).

I have a 2 large scars on the back of my left hand that resulted from an evening of far too much achohol for me. I was at a highschool party with many friends but nobody knew how this happened, I certainly don't.

Ah once broke my nose after one whiskey/cocaine fueled evening back in my reckless 20s. I just woke up one morning and it was all bloodied and smashed. No one knows how it got that way. It be all crooked now, see?



[Edited on Feb 07, 2004 by Seth0067]