Smartass retorts

I usually just hit them with the old favorite, "SHUT THE FUCK UP, ASSHOLE!'

I guess that's not really a witty retort. Oh well- there's something about a big guy screaming. It's like, "Something must be REALLY wrong if THAT much person is shouting at the top of his lungs."

...whats the big deal?

Oh YEAH!!!!! Well you're a big , fat , STUPID HEAD!!!!!

Ever since grade school that little gem has been crushing the egos of evildoers all over the nation . There is absolutely NO response that can equal it .

"No, YOU suck!"