You might be a stoner if...

If you see a cockroach and say "you know I smoked your uncle once"

[Edited on Jan 15, 2004 by RomeoReject]

...you havent driven in a month cause you spent your insurance money on an ounce

Dude.

Not in the shower, but I have been spotted sitting on the kitchen floor in Spongebob slippers and a bathrobe chowin' down on who knows what... Fuck if I know, I don't remember any of it.

I keep an eternabowl of chocolate in my fridge ... Mini Reese's Cups, Nestle Crunches, Hershey Kisses, etc ...

It has only been empty twice, ever ...
If you're keeping score at home, Reese's and Rolos go the quickest.

...if your upstairs roommate finds 250 pieces of his brand new lined paper, strewn perfectly around his house with messages written on them by you. Messages that include:
"Don't eat me, I'm not food" (in the microwave)
"I can see you... and I don't even have eyes, scary.. isn't it?" (on his pillow)
"I'm watching you pee on me" (on his toilet seat)
"This note was brought to you by.. .... ..Pea ... Tear ... Griffin. Yeah, Peatear Griffin..." (taped to his Family Guy DVD's)
...and it continued on like that. It was the funniest thing I ever did

...you live in portland.

You sir are my hero... that rules!

If ... you buy the 4 pound bucket of Red Vines like me

if you wake up in the kitchen with you head in the Refrigerator and a tube of toothpaste in your hand.

Haha. I get tons of crazy/stupid ideas like that when I'm stoned... and once the idea gets into my head... I will stop for nothing until I finish. Seriously... he was so creeped out by it, especially since he came home drunk. And he was still finding pieces of paper in random places up to a week later.

However, he wasn't too happy that I wasted that much of his paper.. hahaha.

Was it marachino cherries? Straight from the jar? Coulda been.

- if you smoke weed ontop of your friends garage listening to "Jerusalem" by Sleep at full volume in the early hours of the morning after going to the all night petrol station to buy pepperami's, philadelphia snacks the cheapest tobacco & blue rizla skins.

Not that that has ever happened to me!!!!

You find random bags, film cans and buds scattered around your house you had long forgotten about.

[Edited on Jan 15, 2004 by stockula]

OH FUCK YOU!!!!

...if you proclain that all people are actually insects - filthy dirty perverted creatures, and then decide to write a plan to destroy the earth.

......if you look at innanimate objects thinking "can i turn that into a bong?"

mmmmmmm ... refrigerated mini reeses cups ....

......if you believe you saw Jesus and you've talked to him


.....and he's your friend

yeah, good call

- actually doing it because your so hardcore a stoner
- Buying high times
- watching cheech and chongs "up in smoke" and desiring a fat spliff and a burito
- saying YYYEEEEAAAHHH MMMMAAAANNNN in a monged fashion
- Eating anything in sight
- thinking everything is funny