Magical Pony

Hello!

I was never ever in this thread. Which means it's like I was never here at all.

Magical Pony Fail!

MAGICAL PHONY

Twas several nightmares before Christmas, when with much cacophony
All the SGsters were stirring, to the tunes of a crack cocaine horned magic pony.
Now the posts were written on the boards without care,
With no nopes that old grumpyfuckingtastic members would now post up there.

The children were all given their own news columns,
"My life stories are PRECIOUSSS!!" they exclaimed much like Gollum,
And with my ego in mischief, and my id in a trap,
I just settled my brains in a hot naked polymath's lap.

When out on the boards there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from Members from 2003 to see what was the matter.
Away to the computer screen I flew like a flash,
to watch hot naked punk chicks strip down to their sash.

The shine on the breasts of the newly SG'd
stole some of the lustre of our old weirdo deeds.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But Flux's magical pony with eight tiny pages here.

With a little old member magic, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment this coked up pony would grow a 42 inch dick,
More rapid than eagles down his trousers it came,
And it neighed, and shimmied, and called them by name!

"Now Freakpirate! now, MisterSatan! now, Deckwreck and Flux!
On, AcidGrampa! On, Null! on Scopitone, on Jeff_Fries and to those who don't suck!
To the top of the boards! to the top of the groups!
Let's us corral a posse of gut-busting Fedaykin troops!"

As dry heaves hit us as hopefuls posts fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, they turn on the webcam and cry.
So down to the bottom, with the curses they flew,
as they tried to encourage us to ride the WAAAAAAMBULANCE too,

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney and up my nose a pony coke horn was found.

He was dressed all in pink fur, from his head to his talon,
he had panache, magic, flair, and charm by the gallon.
A bundle of sex toys he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a pervert, just opening his pack.

His eyes-how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a deflowered cherry!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
in order to emphasize - his morals- quite low.

The stump of an asshole shark he held in his teeth, quite arty,
and said 'By George where the fuck is my ANAL FUCKING DICK PARTY!!"
He had a sly cagey face and a slew of sharp claws,
That shook when he laughed, slicing you to ribbons like Jaws

He was grubby and grump, a right snarky old ol' pony,
And I got a contact high from touching him - his magic not phony
A wink of his eye and a bump of his horn,
brought weirdness and joy back to this site of soft porn.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And filled all the stockings, with his dick he did jerk.
And laying the curve of his talon to the side of my nose,
giving me a blast of snow, up the chimney he rose!

He sprang to his full height, to his troops gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the spike born by Thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, ‘ere he drove out of sight,
"Happy Fucksmas to all, and to all a good-night!"

There are times when Super Serious Clapping Dude gif just doesn't cut it.