Friends of the Opposite Sex

This is what happens when you even mention the word boyfriend:

Most of my friends are female as well and I have found myself, early on, attracted to most of them. I think if we were more honest with ourselves we'd discover that there is almost always a mutual attraction up front until we discover that the other person is off the market or determine that they would not be a good fit as a relationship partner. And even then, often there are lingering sexual feelings that are almost never vocalized or expressed but still hang around. For example, I think one of my female friends is quite beautiful and I like to look at her, but since she is taken and so am I, we both understand where we stand with each other.

Maturity, to me, is about learning how to establish boundaries in this area when simultaneously realizing that we all love to flirt. To flirt is human. However, any man who would deny the possibility of a friendship with you the instant he realizes he either a) isn't getting any or b) isn't going to be your boyfriend is cutting off his nose to spite his face. Thankfully we're all not that way.

I was actually complaining about this in another thread somewhere; i seem to get along better with guys in general, but i've found that alot of the time being friendly (as i would with ANY other friend, nothing extra-special) is misconstrued as me liking them, they'll make a move and then fall off the radar when they find out (if) i'm not interested. This has happened a number of times, so obviously i'm not getting something-i probably have three male friends who i KNOW things will always stay platonic with.

a guy who is friends with a girl that is attractive will inevitably become romantically interested in her.

a) she's a very cool chick who he gets along with very well.
b) hey, she's pretty cute too.
c) wow, wouldnt it be great if this relationship went a little further.

either he'll never admit it openly because he doesnt want to alienate the girl, or he'll tell her and they might have a small fling and then they'll never see each other again, or it works out and they live happily ever after.

and its the same for both sexes. guy/girl friendships are hard when one or the other is obviously attractive.

way it goes.

Sweetie....if they stop being your friend as soon as you mention that you have a boyfriend...they weren't your friend to begin with. They were being nice to you in the hopes of a chance at sleeping with you. It's a raw deal, but that's one of the things that comes with being a woman.

The only solution is to be more careful about who you consider a true friend.

just wanted to add that i think this might've been read and misinterpreted by someone i *am* actually interested in but doesn't believe me

Deep inside, I really want to have sex with all of my female friends anyway.

elbow deep inside?

While the friends thing can work there is always the possibility of becoming more than friends

But given the fact that me asking a girl for her number results in an otherwise worded fuck you as in "why the hell would I give you my number, for what reason" meaning you're either gay to just want to be my friend or you just want to have sex with me.

No, dick deep inside THEM.

I am completely with Cash. But cabaretic's argument does point to a way of dealing with that unfortunate truth, if you can get the guys on board with it.

If you decide to go with the "tell them I'm a lesbian" feint, make sure you sell it---otherwise, it's like telling them you are a Nun; an obstacle to be overcome.

Dude, you might want to look at how you ask for a phone number.