NEWS: Oddest Movies Turned Musicals

CULTURE: Oddest Movies Turned Musicals

Does everything need to be a Broadway musical? Oh, it does? Cool.

So, I don't know much about musicals, screen or stage. I'll say that right off the bat. The only musical I honestly liked (loved, actually) is the Clint Eastwood, Lee Marvin film Paint Your Wagon. It's got a rep as a so-bad-it's-good type film but I love it 100 percent unironically. Lee Marvin plays a guy drunk the entire movie, Clint is Clint, and they take turns fighting, mining gold and sleeping with the stunning Jean Seberg. Plus, there's a bull vs. bear fight! The lobby card featuring a long underwear adorned Marvin floating down a river in a bathtub might be my favorite possession.

Anyway, to get back to my point... I might not know much about musicals, however, as most of you are already aware, I do know plenty about shooting my mouth off in a derisive, borderline unfair, debatably funny manner regarding things I'm only marginally familiar with. So, why not me then, for the position of guy who brings you a list of the...

Oddest Movies Soon to be (or Already) Made Into Musicals!

Legally Blonde

This is the perfect example of a lightweight piece of fluff-film that absolutely achieved its full potential, going as far as it ever needed to go, as a movie. Did it need to be simplified further and topped off with some new dance number? I mean a dance number. Perhaps this falls under the "me not knowing the ins and outs of musicals" part, but, I don't know. Is anyone under 60 interested in this?

Grumpy Old Men

Really? Did the story of two old men bickering and battling and eventually finding friendship (A grudging respect? Common ground, maybe?) need this treatment? Maybe they'll utilize a Jack Lemmon-like crash test dummy for the "Spy vs. Spy" antics, amp up the explosions and add falling pianos, but I doubt it. Is anyone under 70 interested in this?

Brokeback Mountain

Technically an opera but that seemed close enough. I'm already dreading inevitable Brokeback jokes so I'll just keep it moving...

Spider-Man

The greatest super-hero of them all, Spider-Man himself will be turned into a Broadway musical. This one sounds pretty good, actually. Especially if they turn up the web-slinging insanity. Loud music accompanying multiple bad-asses, bouncing and leaping around a stage, could be phenomenal. Pumpkin bombs! Audiences covered in webbing that looks and feels like silly string! Doc Ock!

What puts it in the odd category is the part where U2's Bono and The Edge will be writing music for the show. Huh? Shouldn't they be working on the U2 show? Are they Spidey fans? Musical fans? Do U2 fans want to see super-heroes on stage? I guess we'll see, it just seems so random. "Oh yeah, we're doing a Star Wars musical and Sylvester Stallone is directing it." Okay.

First Wives Club

I recall clumsily recommending this movie to my mother shortly after her divorce. That was probably the extent of my thoughtfulness. I think she liked it. I don't remember her saying it needed high notes delivered over people kicking in unison.


So, there you have it. I don't know, it just seems like this art form maybe deserves better than rehashed versions of mediocre movies from the '90s (and Spider-Man, the world's greatest super-hero). Why do I care? Don't I have better things to worry about? I don't know and, no. Somehow this trend is going to get out of hand and start to actually affect my life and, when it does, I'll have wished I'd done something to nip it in the bud earlier.

I'm not claiming to be an expert, just offering my picks for incredibly odd choices. To those of you out there with actual knowledge of musicals and why they work and don't, who feel like chiming in, please do so.



TheCoolerKing has said everything he'll ever need to say about musicals.

Although I don't necessarily like Legally Blonde: The Musical, I do know that it won a Tony or two and did really well (mostly girls under 16). I have heard about Spider-Man, and ohhh am I excited! =]

Is there anything as god-awful as a musical?

No.

Evil Dead, the musical, anyone? Although my friend saw it and said it was fantastic.

I feel like brokeback is the worst musical idea in the history of the world. lol
<3

The Grumpy Old Men musical is appalling. I love that movie but come on... I don't want to see some Walter Matthau-wannabe singing along to a dance number about his precious green hornet:

"The green hornet's caught more fish than you've lied about, Gustafson!"

I think my pick for best musical is the fictitious Ronnie Dobbs: The Musical.

Dude, it was fucking brilliant. The night I saw it Bruce Campbell was there to do a Q&A after the show.

Another bizarre musical? Silence of the Lambs

"ya'll are bruuuutaliiiiizin' meeeeeeeeee"

The LOTR Musical featuring Värttinä was quite awesome.

Cannibal the musical.

nuff said

you forgot the biggest one of all

yea, i shit you not!

i agree.
i'm kind of into the totally random movie turned into a musical idea. ok, except brokeback. that's just going to be terrible.

Remind me to go watch Phantom again... please!!!

I really liked it when I saw it in Toronto last summer. It really was worth buying tickets in the splatter zone.

I cant say I hate musicals, as I love Mel Brooks movies. Never saw any of those coming, tho.

*hides all of my Legally Blonde: The Musical paraphernalia*



In all seriousness, I kind of love LB: TM. And I can see how The First Wive's Club would work on Broadway. But Grumpy Old Men? They would have to change the characters a lot, and the only good thing about it would be the dad. You know... the "Come-on-I-wanna-lay-ya" guy...

hahaha... Point Break Live! may not be a "musical" per se, but it is definitely the most hilarious stage adaptation of a movie i've seen recently.

for the fans of SG Radio, the PBL guys took this video when they came on air back in January :

I hear that they wanted to make a Lord of the Rings musical but I guess it went on stage... there is also a Shrek musical in talks.

Tickets are already on sale for Shrek the musical.

I can't believe the reality show about the Legally Blonde muscial. It's unwatchable, like a pink chorus line of dogs waiting to be shot.

I love the part where he points the shotgun at his own crotch.

Young Frankenstein was absolutely fantastic as a musical.

Spamalot was great as well.


So they aren't all bad.

I will agree with that.

Not only are they auditioning girls that would have never otherwise had any chance on Broadway, but they are also forcing Laura Bell Bundy out of the show so they can fit in whoever wins the reality show.

Dear MTV, stop ruining lives. Love- Q