Nominations for the crappiest way to break up

Mine would be the "string along", where they just stop returning calls and expect you to just immediately get it.

i would have to say in the round about way.

the let's have a talk about our relationship and i break up with you but you don't get it till later and have to call back to ask if we just broke up. to which i respod wiht a sheepish, yes.

i am either a bitch or i date idiots. or both.

Oh and yes I did just get dumped. I know a lot of you dislike me so go ahead and take your cheap shots.

I always get the
just-stop-being-nice-and-be-mean-all-the-time-instead method to force ME to do the breaking up...

i'd just like to say i'm still bitter, but anyway. this girl (cunt) my love and i dated for 5 or 6 months started getting weird towards christmas. we tried to get her to talk about it, but she would just sit in her room and act all depressed. she wouldn't return phone calls or come to the door or anything. so we'd stop by when her mom was home and try to get her to talk. but if we pushed she'd leave the house.

when we asked she said she didn't want to break up, she just needed some alone time. so we finally said okay and pretty much left her alone. we checked up on her every now and then to make sure she was okay. she wouldn't talk, but we'd still try. she'd just sit there and watch movies while we talked and she pretended to be ignoring us.

we finally found out from her mom (who didn't know about us) that she had been seeing her ex again. had also possibly been dating this friend of hers. she disappeared one day with her baby and ran off to live with her ex in alabama. the ex, by the way, being a guy who was abusive, she had a restraining order against, and he tried to run my love and his sister off the road a couple of times. she put her ex's sister in jail for threatening to kill her. it had been a crazy fucked up relationship.

we never heard from her again. no goodbye, no i wanna end this, nothing.

anyway, did i mention i was bitter?

polyamorus relationships are an extra burden to the already dificult job of keeping a two person relationship stable, phewww feel for you.

polyamorus relationships are an extra burden to the already dificult job of keeping a two person relationship stable, phewww feel for you.

My personal fav:
You've kind of gotten fat,
I'm not really down with fat people
so..
um..
yeah, don't call me anymore

I used that one once, it was nice.

Another winner:

Why the fuck are you crying?
I'm sorry but your just too fucking emotional for me
I'm out.

I once got, "Well, i think you should break up with me. I slept with one of your friends. I'm just not good." Bastard.

Want to have sex all the time, have sex with you a hundred times, and then suddenly say, "Y'know, I think we should hold off on sex for a while.. indefinitely." Thus throwing you into a psychological complex "What happened? What changed? Is she cheating on me? Does she not think I'm attractive any more? What the fuck??" and making things all weird, until you finally break up with her -- whereby she can then tell her friends that YOU were the asshole because obviously you were just using her for sex.


[Edited on Oct 02, 2003 by Keith]

Hey Keith add that to the string along and thats pretty much what I got. But you're a jerk if you feel you have the right to know what changed.

I won't go into any details, but ventriloquism wasn't as good an idea as I first thought it would be. I guess breaks ups seem kind of insincere when coming from a souless wooden mouth.

Any way that's not forthcoming and assertive is going down on the crappy list.

[Edited on Oct 02, 2003 by TimTheEnchanter]

There's the classic "I'm a lesbian." What can you say to that?

I was at home sick one day. Jammies, blankee, daytime TV, the whole nine. Suddenly my girlfriend came over with a plate of brownies and a video of Simpsons episodes she taped for me. She gave me a kiss on the cheek and rushed off to work.

I was watching the video, and munching on the brownies (they were delicious). A couple of episodes into it the Simpsons stopped. Instead of the show it was a video of my girlfriend giving some guy a blow job. When he came in her mouth she walked over to the camera and said "It's over, don't ever call me again." and spit his load into a bowl of brownie mix.

DING DING DING>>>>>>WE HAVE A WINNER

ooOO I know i know

A guy I'd been seeing on and off for about 5 months, much against my better judgement, decided that instead of saying something to my face, the decent honorable thing to do was to leave a comment on a livejournal.. someone ELSES livejournal no less... saying that he wanted me to get out of his life.

I didnt paticularly want to be there in the first place

But still.. fucking LIVEJOURNAL??

Phone message :

'Welcome to Dumpsville. Population : You."

"It's not way you look or anything like that, but your credit report and status are very troublesome. You are irresponsible. Goodbye."

That's the jist of it.

Or how about, someday you're going to make someone happy, but it's sure as ALL HELL not going to be ME. You did for THEN, but you will do no longer.

Jesus dude. I have to admit, my first reaction is also "What the fuck did you do to her?"

I wish they would go something like progress reports at work. Like "you lack in this and this but are good at this, we have to let you go at the end of the pay period, here is your severance pay, (last date, maybe last nightcap), and I will supply a good letter of reference, ie not talk shit about you to her girlfriends.

Double Post, WTF?

[Edited on Oct 02, 2003 by levezletoi]

Nothing . . . all I did was have sex with her mom . . . sheesh!

Just kidding, the story is fiction. I read it on lowbrow.com