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Virtute

Virtute

Brooklyn, NY
July 2007

JAN 26, 2008 06:38 PM

This isn't silliness, goddamnit. I was here years before silliness, and refuse to bow down to posting a questionable topic in there rather than a real forum.
This is a question of sorts. I'm 27, and until now figured I can still do something of merit with my life. Tonight's a slow night. I'm watching the Dresden Files online. I saw an actress who looked familiar. I looked her up, and it turns out she was born in 1980. Yikes.
I'm in law school, which is something I guess, but this woman is on tv and in pictures, and very much my age.
So here the question. How many of you are 27 (or older) and feel like you've done fuck all with your lives? Subtopic: If so, what then? Just try to make an impact, or figure your time has passed, and try to tread water until you die in a nursing home/in a pool of one's own vomit?
I'm genuinely curious. I also hope to hear from my '04s and earlier on this.

-Haverchuck

Stiles

Stiles

New York, NY
November 2002

JAN 26, 2008 06:42 PM

No matter how far you've gone, someone else has gone further and done more at your age - or younger.

Don't spend too much energy on it, everyone has coulda/woulda/shoulda, those people included.

Virtute

Virtute

Brooklyn, NY
July 2007

JAN 26, 2008 06:46 PM

Stiles said:
No matter how far you've gone, someone else has gone further and done more at your age - or younger.

Don't spend too much energy on it, everyone has coulda/woulda/shoulda, those people included.



You've done great in your field. Out of curiosity, when did you really break in? I know you were having success in Philly before you made the move to NY.

Stiles

Stiles

New York, NY
November 2002

JAN 26, 2008 07:16 PM

I've done OK. Some of my friends have made more money, traveled more places, gotten more stuff, done more things than I have, and I'm OK with that. If you like your field and make enough to pay the bills with a little left over for fun and a cushion against the unexpected, everything else is gravy.

MisterSatan

MisterSatan

Vancouver, WA
August 2002

JAN 26, 2008 07:35 PM

Fuck, man. Maybe you should stop worrying about the imaginary yardstick by which your life will be judged and just do whatever the hell you want to. It's your life. Shit, I'm 30 and I'm still not quite sure I want to do what I do now for the rest of my life. I'm also okay with that- because it's my decision to make. As long as you're not a drain on society or a threat to anyone's children, do whatever you like.

Bastardo

Bastardo

Boston, MA
January 2005

JAN 26, 2008 07:38 PM

MisterSatan said:
Fuck, man. Maybe you should stop worrying about the imaginary yardstick by which your life will be judged and just do whatever the hell you want to. It's your life. Shit, I'm 30 and I'm still not quite sure I want to do what I do now for the rest of my life. I'm also okay with that- because it's my decision to make. As long as you're not a drain on society or a threat to anyone's children, do whatever you like.



Hell, I'm 32 and I get Olympic years and Leap years mixed up.

Virtute

Virtute

Brooklyn, NY
July 2007

JAN 26, 2008 07:45 PM

MisterSatan said:
Fuck, man. Maybe you should stop worrying about the imaginary yardstick by which your life will be judged and just do whatever the hell you want to. It's your life. Shit, I'm 30 and I'm still not quite sure I want to do what I do now for the rest of my life. I'm also okay with that- because it's my decision to make. As long as you're not a drain on society or a threat to anyone's children, do whatever you like.



I tend to not worry about it until the random moment when I realize one of my classmate is 23 (or 21, god forbid) then I just feel sad.
You're a fantastic person with a lovely wife, so you're doing alright. It's a bit difficult for us sometimes who haven't found that connection to make some sort of hay with what we've got.


ps Glad you're back, even if I have mostly no use for this place these days. Your voice boards wise is valuable wherever you choose to use it

MisterSatan

MisterSatan

Vancouver, WA
August 2002

JAN 26, 2008 07:51 PM

Virtute said:
I tend to not worry about it until the random moment when I realize one of my classmate is 23 (or 21, god forbid) then I just feel sad.
You're a fantastic person with a lovely wife, so you're doing alright. It's a bit difficult for us sometimes who haven't found that connection to make some sort of hay with what we've got.


ps Glad you're back, even if I have mostly no use for this place these days. Your voice boards wise is valuable wherever you choose to use it



Have you been drinking varnish, kid? I'm a miserable bastard who got extremely lucky. I still think unravled suffered some kind of mild head trauma about 4 years ago.

In all seriousness, you need to stop comparing yourself with others. Trust me, it's really easy to look at something you don't have and feel like a failure, just because you don't have it. And before you say, "Easy for you to say," let me remind the court that I wasn't always married to the most beautiful girl in Puppetland.

I guess what I'm saying is, stop worrying about it and just live your life. It's not like feeling down about what you don't have helps you any.

adjunct

adjunct

Philadelphia, PA
July 2002

JAN 26, 2008 07:52 PM

Christ, dude, stop hanging out with law students. Achievement is not measured in how little time you can compress it into.

Stiles

Stiles

New York, NY
November 2002

JAN 26, 2008 07:59 PM

Keep in mind that a bunch of those fast-track high achievers will change their minds and veer off into something totally different after a while, since they chose a path at a comparitively young age because relatives wanted them to: A) be someone or B) do something particular or C) they thought it was a good idea at the time.

I have a BFA that I've not used since graduation, and I could have bought a house or started a business with that money a lot earlier than I did. It was still a great experience even if I have relatively little to show for it that is tangible.

One of my clients gave up a profitable career as a high powered corporate lawyer to open a landscaping business so he could be outside working in the dirt with his Labrador retriever. That decision was made a lot easier by having a bunch of cash put away from said BigLaw job, of course.

unravled

unravled

Vancouver, WA
August 2003

JAN 26, 2008 08:01 PM

MisterSatan said:

Have you been drinking varnish, kid? I'm a miserable bastard who got extremely lucky. I still think unravled suffered some kind of mild head trauma about 4 years ago.



Soooooo good it's unbelievable!

MisterSatan

MisterSatan

Vancouver, WA
August 2002

JAN 26, 2008 08:02 PM

Stiles said:
One of my clients gave up a profitable career as a high powered corporate lawyer to open a landscaping business so he could be outside working in the dirt with his Labrador retriever. That decision was made a lot easier by having a bunch of cash put away from said BigLaw job, of course.



That's pretty much the only reason I do what I do now, so I can retire early and open up a barbecue joint.

unravled

unravled

Vancouver, WA
August 2003

JAN 26, 2008 08:02 PM

adjunct said:
Achievement is not measured in how little time you can compress it into.



This is true. It's measured by penis size.

unravled

unravled

Vancouver, WA
August 2003

JAN 26, 2008 08:06 PM

Also, everyone knows that no one posts anything except news articles in Lifestyles anymore.

Margot_Dent

Margot_Dent

Los Angeles, CA
February 2004

JAN 26, 2008 08:13 PM

unravled said:
Also, everyone knows that no one posts anything except news articles in Lifestyles anymore.



How is this news?!

magpieboy

magpieboy

Seattle, WA
June 2004

JAN 26, 2008 08:20 PM

I'm 29. I have grey hairs, and I discovered today that I have things with faded price tags from years gone past on them.

And I felt cool.

Zarth

Zarth

Seattle, WA
December 2004

JAN 26, 2008 08:27 PM

unravled said:

adjunct said:
Achievement is not measured in how little time you can compress it into.


This is true. It's measured by penis size.


That actually improved my mood. Thank you.

crispy

crispy

NEWSWIRE

Philadelphia, PA

JAN 26, 2008 08:29 PM

Twenty-seven is awfully young to be having a mid-life crisis, isn't it?

I'm not going to get into specifics, but I am nowhere near where I thought I'd be at this age, and I'm okay with that. At least I am most of the time.

Don't concern yourself with the "what if" and "I could've" crap.
That shit does nothing positive for you.

Concentrate on making tomorrow better than today, and trying to find a little slice of happiness in life.

PerilousPup

PerilousPup

I'm lost
May 2007

JAN 26, 2008 10:04 PM

At least you aren't crying flies about your misfortune....

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

Did that cheer you up?

unravled

unravled

Vancouver, WA
August 2003

JAN 27, 2008 10:14 AM

PerilousPup said:
At least you aren't crying flies about your misfortune....

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

Did that cheer you up?



Christ, could you be any more condescending?

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

Answer: Yes, but only if you had said, "buck up, camper."

Cash

Cash

I'm lost
OLD SKOOL

JAN 27, 2008 12:40 PM

Virtute said:
This isn't silliness, goddamnit. I was here years before silliness, and refuse to bow down to posting a questionable topic in there rather than a real forum.
This is a question of sorts. I'm 27, and until now figured I can still do something of merit with my life. Tonight's a slow night. I'm watching the Dresden Files online. I saw an actress who looked familiar. I looked her up, and it turns out she was born in 1980. Yikes.
I'm in law school, which is something I guess, but this woman is on tv and in pictures, and very much my age.
So here the question. How many of you are 27 (or older) and feel like you've done fuck all with your lives? Subtopic: If so, what then? Just try to make an impact, or figure your time has passed, and try to tread water until you die in a nursing home/in a pool of one's own vomit?
I'm genuinely curious. I also hope to hear from my '04s and earlier on this.

-Haverchuck



I'm a very, very lucky man. A few years ago I went through my quarter-llife crisis...just like you are now. You're spiraling towards 30 and you;re thinking "Man...I haven't done jack shit with my life". I know...I've been there.

I didn't find what I loved until I was 29. I fell into a career that I never would have thought I'd be in. I'm one of those vew few...and very lucky people that actually loves what they do for a living. I don't "like" my job. I don't "tolerate" my job. I fucking LOVE my job. I actually look forward to going to work. What'll make you want to punch me in the face even more...is that I make a decent living doing it. Hell...I'd do it for food & shelter....but they end up paying me a decent wage.

My point is...if you spend your life wondering what you coul dhave done better...or fretting over what you don't have...you'll be miserable.

An aspiring writer once asked Charles Bukowski what he could do to become a better writer. Bukowski told the kid "Don't write...live". I take that to mean...don't worry too much about the preparation for the future, and just focus on living your life. It's good to have plans for the future...but don't plan your life away.

You have to ask yourself..."what would actually make me happy?" Not what you think would make you rich...or give you standing...or impress anyone...but what would make you truly content with life.

If you can find that...you won't need anything else.

Rush

Rush

Long Island City, NY
June 2005

JAN 27, 2008 01:07 PM

I'm 27, and I was one of the oldest interns a few years ago where I worked, and I am one of the oldest assistants where I work now. My manager is only a few years older than me, and has way more experience in the field. It's depressing to know that I'm not as successful as I'd rather be yet. And that I still don't really know if I am in the right field, or whether I am investing valuable career time with the right company. Right now, I hate my job.

It really fucking sucks.

If you find out how to make yourself feel better about it, let me know.

Harleen

Harleen

United Kingdom
June 2005

JAN 27, 2008 04:28 PM

I'm 28 and have no idea what I want to do, other than travel, which is difficult because I'm truly poor. I have grey hairs. My nephews and neices are actually planning their own careers (this is depressing).
But... I can drink my boyfriend under the table, which is achievement enough for me tonight smile

PRockGirlScout

PRockGirlScout

Hawaii National Park, HI
October 2005

JAN 27, 2008 06:57 PM

Comparing yourself with others isn't the problem. You're just comparing yourself to the wrong people. 40 year old gas station attendants and wal-mart cashiers. That's where the relative glory's at. smile

Squire

Squire

La Crosse, WI
November 2003

JAN 28, 2008 02:15 AM

Cash said:

Virtute said:
This isn't silliness, goddamnit. I was here years before silliness, and refuse to bow down to posting a questionable topic in there rather than a real forum.
This is a question of sorts. I'm 27, and until now figured I can still do something of merit with my life. Tonight's a slow night. I'm watching the Dresden Files online. I saw an actress who looked familiar. I looked her up, and it turns out she was born in 1980. Yikes.
I'm in law school, which is something I guess, but this woman is on tv and in pictures, and very much my age.
So here the question. How many of you are 27 (or older) and feel like you've done fuck all with your lives? Subtopic: If so, what then? Just try to make an impact, or figure your time has passed, and try to tread water until you die in a nursing home/in a pool of one's own vomit?
I'm genuinely curious. I also hope to hear from my '04s and earlier on this.

-Haverchuck



I'm a very, very lucky man. A few years ago I went through my quarter-llife crisis...just like you are now. You're spiraling towards 30 and you;re thinking "Man...I haven't done jack shit with my life". I know...I've been there.

I didn't find what I loved until I was 29. I fell into a career that I never would have thought I'd be in. I'm one of those vew few...and very lucky people that actually loves what they do for a living. I don't "like" my job. I don't "tolerate" my job. I fucking LOVE my job. I actually look forward to going to work. What'll make you want to punch me in the face even more...is that I make a decent living doing it. Hell...I'd do it for food & shelter....but they end up paying me a decent wage.

My point is...if you spend your life wondering what you coul dhave done better...or fretting over what you don't have...you'll be miserable.

An aspiring writer once asked Charles Bukowski what he could do to become a better writer. Bukowski told the kid "Don't write...live". I take that to mean...don't worry too much about the preparation for the future, and just focus on living your life. It's good to have plans for the future...but don't plan your life away.

You have to ask yourself..."what would actually make me happy?" Not what you think would make you rich...or give you standing...or impress anyone...but what would make you truly content with life.

If you can find that...you won't need anything else.



+1
I feel a support group coming on.

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