NEWS: Rethinking Adoption: Birth Mothers are People, Too

I cannot even fathom what a horribly difficult decision it would be for a parent to choose between adoption, abortion, or keeping a child. The only thing that I am sure of, is that it is not my right to place limitations on the decisions of others in that regard.

I read everything, and all I can think is "They spelled 'kidnapped' wrong".

I don't always agree with your articles, but this was very interesting. I'll have to find the book.

I have to say that this was an interesting read, being adopted myself that is. My birth mother lived with my (current) parents for a large portion of her pregnancy after being kicked out of the house by her own parents and after her boyfriend left her. She was 18, and against abortion, and my parents had no way of having their own child, yet they wanted one more than anything. I suppose they were all lucky in that sense - my birth mother knew the parents I was going to and trusted them and knew they could give me a better, more fulfilling life than she could at the time. I know I am one of the lucky ones. Sometimes, I wonder though if she ever thinks about me...cause like someone else stated a few comments back, I am also always aware of being adopted, as much as I love my parents. I'm really considering finding her one day.

Sounds like an interesting read.

Here in Australia there was the forced adoption of indigenous babies, 'the stolen generation' - a terrible chapter in our short history.

Without denegrating that at all, roughly 4x as many white 'unwed' women had their children 'coerced' into adoption - this was done, as you say, with blank pieces of paper and use of the newly found barbiturates.

I'm adopted(as is my Sister) and I have contacted my Birthmother.

It's an incredibly awkward thing to be. My Parents were open and honest with me about my being adopted and while I am grateful to them for that It still tends to be a large part of my identity as a person.

It's Kinda like my Life was one throw of the dice. I could have been Kept, Aborted, or given to another family very easily. And I'd've have become a different person(or not one at all) instead.

My Biological mother is a wonderful person, and I find my biological half-sisters to be simply wonderful, but every time I get a chance to see them it's almost painful.

I'm being confronted with everything I might be, and everything that could happen to me. There is so much kindness and acceptance in their family, but also what seems to be a pervasive fear of commitment. Qualities that I find engendered in myself.

The whole Nature Vs. Nurture argument gathers much weight when I'm around these people who happen to look a lot like me. I'm so much like them despite never truly being of them. And Being around them I feel powerless to change who I am.

And as for the other side of the argument; the Nurture. It frightens me to think of how I could have turned out with another family. Hell, I could've been a doctor, or I could of been dead(I had medical problems as an infant, my Adoptive Mom[God Rest Her Soul] figured out what was wrong and saved me). Then again, I might be the same naive, fucked-up person I am today, just in a different neighborhood.

It is something I've never completely come to terms with, and I've had it comparatively easy. My Sister will never contact her Biological parents because there are no records. She feels abandoned and spited by her biological mother and her country of birth.

I had an Ex-Girlfriend who's father went through a lot of grief when, 53 years old, he discovers he's adopted and that his entire natural family is dead. "It's like I've been robbed of my identity and never realized".

Well, on the plus side, at least I never yelled at my dad: "You're Not my Real Dad". Because y'know, He is.

EDIT:: Oh, and Damn you people! I came to this site for the Bewbs, and I find myself getting into deep personal discussions about matters of consequence. For Shame!

Interesting read. Thanks.

I got this book a while back and I still mention it whenever I get the chance in school, with friends, etc. I have yet to find a decent book that covers the same topics and in a way that can apply to then and now...Thanks for making another great article.

I was adopted and also not to give any props to the wacko left at least adoption is an alternative to abortion, but I'm also not a woman so I don't know what it would be like to give one up

I don't liken it to being a gift or a pair of socks but more like a commodity or a new toy.
It's America BTW where everything is for sale.