NEWS: A Fridge for a Baby? How About a Jeep? Eh, Fuck It. Just Kill Me Now.

CULTURE: A Fridge for a Baby? How About a Jeep? Eh, Fuck It. Just Kill Me Now.

Last May it was Japan with this retardation. Now it's Russia. The governor of Ulyanovsk, a central Russian province, told his constituents to skip work and fuck today. As you might have guessed, this is all part of a well-thought-out attempt to boost the Russian population, which is shrinking by about 700,000 people a year.

Not only does it not matter if it's a girl or a boy--it doesn't matter if the child is the product of a marriage, or a single mother.

Anyone curious about why the Russian population is shrinking? Oh, just because births are failing to outpace a high death rate boosted by AIDS, alcoholism and suicide. That's all. Just an AIDS epidemic, chronic alcoholism, and suicide. All of which will clearly be solved by, um, more people to drink, fuck, and kill themselves. Yeah, more babies will fix it.



They clearly put a lot of brainpower into this plan.



Dasvidanya, Russia.

Damn, nasty.

See if people could just sell kids on ebay this shit would not happen.

The world is run by geniuses.

So the US encourages abstinence only, China encourages a kyoto protocol like approach and Russia tells its citizens to get busy?

why can't governments keep their minds out of the gutter!?

I think personally I'd rather be given some sort of monetary reward, kids are fuckin expensive...although judge from what you just said they'd probably just spend the money on booze and dirty drugs

to clear out surplus kitchen appliances? sounds like a plan to me!

if that's the case the why doesn't china give away knife sets that they have to normally sell 40 bucks a set on the home shopping network?

But honestly, overpopulation isn't all that simple. Sure you can stop people from breeding, but you can't stop them getting old. THe problem that most modernizaed nations face is that their population get's so wise to their own personal space that they turn into panda's and stop breeding, Troubel is that twenty years later you've got a dwindling workforce and forty years later you've got a bunch of baby boomers preparing to enter a social security system that isn't as secure as it was once thought.

You also have to look at the imbalance of it all...Russia's Population is shrinking but other countries are bursting at the seems. Notice how Russia isn't giving any kickbacks to people wanting to move into their country? They are ok with giving russian citizens a pat on the back for bumping uglies, but will they give a jeep to an immigrant? I doubt it. So while Industrialized Nations build walls to keep people out they screw themselves from the inside by freaking them out over a population problem that is primarily effecting the people they refuse to provide aide for (unless THEY stop breeding too.)

In all fairness, Ulyanovsk is a quite nice Russian city (for more reasons than just being Lenin's birthplace). I doubt that the problems of suicide, AIDS, violent crime, and alcoholism are as rampant there. I felt safer in Ulyanovsk than in any of the other Russian towns I have visited.

Also, while the prize of a Jeep is sort of laughable, the idea of trying to give awards, social recognition, and hopefully other forms of aid (which Putin's administration is trying to do) to families who produce children isn't a bad idea. If a family receives an apartment for having a child on that day, for instance, their lives would be greatly improved.

Because while the world as a whole is experiencing a population explosion some countries in the world are falling apart due to lack of population to support their infrastructure. This isn't an ideological issue about the large human population fucking up the planet(although I would say that, yes, overpopulation is a problem) it's about the specific nations, Russia, as cited in this story, China, due to it's very strong mandate to limit couples to one child and thus causing a huge gender gap of, I believe, a 63% male society, Japan, and others all expanding their industries and infrastructure faster than their population can support and even their current infrastructure falling apart due to declining numbers. On a global scale high population is a dangerous thing, on a national scale, the effects of insufficient population are far more disturbing.

oops, somehow a double post, sorry.

A fridge for a baby?

I'd keep the fridge.

I didn't get a damn fridge when I had my baby... my fridge is going all to hell too

If you can't talk about a solution to the problem, then please refrain from posting an opinion of an article in which you chastize the subjects of the said article without a sound or reasonable opinion by which you can promote a solution to the problem.
I think this is genius, at least it is a solution and they are using government money to reward, rather than to kill anyone (not that they don't.)

How is a lower population a bad thing? Explain to me.

less cannon fodder, tax payers and workers.

There's not a lot of times when your boss has to sit you down, look you in the eye and say "Go home, and make me a baby".

It's a good day.

Here and there we see exciting instances where we have the unique chance of lowering populations without horrific epidemics, genocide, or warfare. And they inevitablely fuck it up.

damn man. this reminds me of game shows in the 60's. might try to pawn off the idea 2 a tv station near me. good reality tv.

i feel like im watching a news clip from that daria news progra,m "sick sad world"

In Soviet Russia, news clip watches you!

I'd guess that they're losing the bulk of that population in people leaving for western countries because it's just shitty to live in Russia.

xazapdmytinu said:

You can. Adopt and you can claim childcare expenses on your taxes for 18 years. Up to 10,000 a year.