NEWS: My Life Was Better Before I Knew Who Star Jones Was

I hate her for flat-out DENYING she had gastric bypass, and telling everyone she lost a ton of weight in a short amount of time through diet and exercise. It was like she was looking down on people who have gastric bypass. And now that she admits it, it's like she was ashamed of it. Thus, instead of being a role model for other people who need the surgery, she told thousands of people that they should be ashamed.

Plus, she looks like a mantis.

I knew a kid in high school who smelled like celery, and I hated him, he hated me, and the world moved much as it always has. I expect he'll kill me some day with a high powered rifle, but until that day, I got nothing against celery. And you can't like guacamole if you don't like cilantro, that's the whole trick to quac, and salsa for that matter.

Now this is someone we should all admire and respect. Look at the conviction in his actions. The way the snaps off a piece of that bell pepper in between his teeth; the way in which he draws out the bell pepper to show us what he's just done; the pure bliss in his eyes from eating this fine vegetable/fruit. Its kind of like the way I look at my women after we have done the goodness and I know that there's a smile on her face...which to this day has sadly enough only happened once Oh well. Its also kind of like what I was feeling like this morning walking into work BEFORE I read this damned article and saw that crap-ass picture of Star Jones...I tried to wash my eyes out in the eye sink but they still burn. I say this to you TCK, retribution will be mine and you will curse the day you subjected us to this horrid monstrosity...oh, you will curse the day indeed.

And to think TCK could have taken this to his grave and left us in peace. Selfish son of a bitch!!!...nothing personal, of course.

Now I'm going to go take a cold shower.

hahahhahhaha that made me laugh way too hard... im sore

The only thing worse than Star Jones are threads that should be journal entries.

I just saw her last night on TV and am convinced Aliens have replaced her, just as they did Michael Jackson.

i too tried to hide from all knowledge of star jones' existence, but i lost in the end.
the next best thing i can do is just to pretend she doesn't exist and hope that maybe in time i'll just forget about her.

yeah...eh.

bell peppers must be properly cookede to do anything other than ruin a good entree, but I must agree with formus you clearly are talking out of your ass when you deny the goodness that is cillantro.
perhaps if you dont like veggies you could revert to team omnivore...

i hate bell peppers. but i'd rather eat them than star jones.

I gotta stop basing my thoughts of an article on other people's comments. So Dane Cook loves peppers and Star Jones' big bones are starring in a new Star Wars Movie. Talk about an interesting news days!

I used to hate all peppers, even the pepper you put on your food.
Now I like bell peppers, and hot peppers I can live without, but still. Bell peppers are good.

People who say bell peppers are bad must want the terrorists to win.

Fuckin right!!

Did this have to be written to fill space? Did this actually have to be edited? Two people need to fing things to fill there lives out.

I HAVE BEEN TELLING MY FRIENDS THIS VERY SAME THING FOR MONTHS ... SOME PEOPLE LOOK TERRIFYING WHEN THIN.

Urgh. She's just inhuman.

Um... What?

babies too

I loved this so much i called my mother and read it to her. She pretends not to know who star jones is as well.