NEWS: Simple Simon, C'mon Why Man

CELEB: Simple Simon, C'mon Why Man

It’s always a mistake to assume because you’re the best at one specific thing, that you can then pick another thing at random and also be great.

A hilarious, often enjoyable to watch, mistake. Michael Jordan playing baseball, “Magic” Johnson hosting a talk show, Emeril starring in a sitcom. Russell Crowe releasing an album… Somehow, the list goes on and on.

It’s mostly athletes and performers who make this mistake. Rarely does a carpenter suddenly decide to try his hand at accounting. Nor do you often see a tow-truck driver attempting to perform spinal surgery. Part of this could be attributed to the fact that most tow-truck drivers don’t surround themselves with half a dozen hanger-ons spouting, “You’re the best!” every eleven seconds.

Despite these humiliating public examples more and more celebs continue to make this mistake.

Well, according to the above paragraph, Fame was already a movie. Perhaps you could try getting inspired by something that isn’t a film? Songs for example, sometimes they’re inspired by a woman. Or by an untimely death. Very rarely do you hear someone say, “Here is my new song, it is inspired by Led Zeppelin’s 'Stairway to Heaven.'”

Again, Rocky was already a movie. A great one. About a hundred other films have been “based” on it. Soccer, dancing, even singing, have all been forced into the Rocky mold with varying results.

Yes, those are some HUGE differences. This story needs to be told. And retold. I don’t watch American Idol but I’m guessing that those who do don’t sit there watching it, saying, “This is cool, but I’d love to see a campy, poorly-acted, version of it complete with a pre-determined ending.”

The ONLY reason people watch this show is to:

1) mock some nut-job

2) root for someone from their hometown

3) watch a genuine competition

4) listen to shitty songs

This movie will only be able to deliver number 4.

You know who I’d suggest for that job? Actors. Professional ones.

Of course. Who better to judge the nuances of the complex art forms that are acting and writing, than a guy who had an idea for a reality show.

Look out tow-truck drivers, surgeons and accountants; he’ll soon be butchering your vocations as well.




TheCoolerKing acknowledges that the title of this piece is the worst pun ever written... by far.

this, is not the greatest song in the world.
this is just a tribute.

So it's American Idol: The Movie, except it's scripted?

Okay...

Super, another box-office release I won't be seeing. They just keep piling up.

GENIUS!

I wish hollywood would make more original movies that aren't based on either another movie or a book.

Then when they do they make stuff like this and I question the wisdom of that.

grrr,
i can't believe that people will enjoy this.

but humans still amaze me,
by the shit they will pay to see.

aye, agreed to the utmost.

People said the same thing about From Justin to Kelly, but look how that turned out.

there are just some things i like to pretend didn't happen!

-_-

"Simon...our ratings are flagging. This has been the least successful season so far. No one even remembers who won. What do we do?"

"Let's drop several million dollars on a movie version."

"You're brilliant, Mr. Cowell! May I fellate you?"

"This blow-job is like bad karaoke. Someone scrape Paula off the ceiling."

....and people thought From Justin to Kelly would fail........

Songs are, actually, quite often inspired by songs. People steal riffs, or they emulate, or respond to, or pay homage to work that's grabbed or moved them. It's especially prevalent in classical music and jazz, an honored and respected practice. Much of the time, a piece that one might describe as a rip-off or derivative or whatever is in fact quite intentionally similar, and not because someone's trying to pretend that they came up with the idea, but because they love that idea so much they've just got to rock with it too. It's common in poetry too, right in the title of a piece, it'll say "After So-and-So", or "After Such-and-Such".

Not that I'm trying to defend Simon here, I'm just saying.

Yay! Movies!

yeh thats ...uhm not really all that suspenseful...and it sorta takes the reality out of it doesn't it?

or is that the goal

the best reality show moments are when somebody forgets their line..

They'll save a ton of money if they just film it with digital video cameras that save straight to DVD right off the bat.

Just so long as Rober Downey Jr plays Paula Abdul.

Hey, there was this crazy, longhaired carpenter who had a pretty big problem with money lenders!! Maybe you heard of him?

Dude! Ahem... lots of people have heard of Jesus, man... that's old news, knoworrimean?

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

So, the guy could cure the blind and heal the crippled but couldn't get a loan for his traveling clinic?

Was it because he didn't take insurance?

That is just so wrong.

Who?



I didn't know people still watched these shows. After Clay Aiken and Ruben...I thought America had collective stopped giving a fuck.

Shows what I know.

Strobe, I admit to watching the show....up until they actually go to Hollywood.

Then it ceases to be entertaining.

Wow. You say that like you were really there.

The thing is I really like Simon Cowell, I mean who else is going to tell self deluded talentless hacks the truth... This movie may just change all that.