Things I've Learned From Michael Bay's Transformers

1. Shia Labeouf is very excitable. Like, a lot.

2. Black people are loud, and also very excitable and love to threaten elderly female relatives.

3. Michael Bay really likes flares. You need to signal someone in a movie? Flares. The Rock? Flares. Pearl Harbor? Flares. Armageddon? Space flares. He probably yells "Cut!" by throwing a flare into camera range.

4. Meghan Fox needs to call me, STAT.

5. John Turturro must have been hard up for cash. I guess the guest spots on "Monk" aren't covering the expenses.

6. Michael Bay actually gets paid for this crap.

7.Transformers sound like parents who are trying their best to come off as hip and youthful but end up as awkward and annoying.

8. There were a total of eight good lines in the movie and none of them came from a robot.

9. Optimus Prime's lips = disturbing.

10. The new Camaro is pretty sexy, especially in a gold color.

Now that's a fucking top ten list.

I keep thinking Optimus Prime is a telephone company.

Is it wrong that I'm looking forward to seeing this? It looks like it could be a good 'guilty pleasure' type of movie, no?

I think the main cause of the hatred is Michael Bay's abysmal track record, which is reinforced by key factors that he fucked with in the movie; things that the core fans of Transformers remembered from the original cartoon series, and were expecting in a feature film.

I saw it tonight and I FUCKING LOVED IT. So good.

what people are forgetting is that this film isn't amied at the core fans i.e the late 20s/early 30s viewer. It's aimed at the 10-20 year old who doesn't even remember the original cartoon and toys but like the idea of big robots that blow lots of stuff up

That may be, but then why not just create a new franchise? As far as I know, there's no copyright on the idea of giant space robots that blow shit up. If they're going to use the Transformers name for the movie, then it would behoove them to follow the source material more closely, as then they would appeal to the hardcore Transformers fans, as well as still attract the larger demographic of that doesn't remember the original series, by virtue of the fact that it would still be giant space robots blowing shit up.

He's probably trying to raise enough money to get Romance and Cigarettes released stateside.

Believe it or not, actors really aren't different from the rest of you. Sometimes they work shitty jobs to pay the bills.

Are you implying that Barton Fink didn't make him enough money for the rest of his life?

damn you film only a few days till your out here !!

I can't believe that woman is with Brian Austin Green...

Not at all, that's how I feel after seeing it last night. I loved the originals from when I was a kid, and there were times while watching it where I inwardly cringed. It was still pretty damn entertaining though, and I think the movie is worth seeing.

Abysmal track record? The Island was the only one of Bay's major releases to not gross way over the films production budget, which in Hollywood terms is all that measures success. You might not like cheezy dialogue, crazy situations, and explosions everywhere but obviously a large part of the public does.

I'm not saying he makes the best films. He doesn't. But once in a while it's fun to go see a mindless action flick, and in that respect Bay is extremely good at what he does.

I liked it and I usually don't like Michael Bays films..also there were some geekgasm moments for me..

No. Fucking. Shit. I saw that crap on IMDd today and I wanted to *cry.*

You should see Fox on the cover of the new Maxim...she's smoking hot.

I take personal offense to that I am 22 and I remember that show almost as well as I remember Ninja Turtles, Denver the Last Dinosaur, and Ducktales