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Aaron_Lariviere

Aaron_Lariviere

Los Angeles, CA
May 2007

JUN 28, 2007 03:35 PM



It wasn’t so long ago that I did a jokey little write-up on Booz2Go, a form of powdered alcohol recently developed in the Netherlands. The whole thing seemed relatively harmless, despite the fact the creators had added a lime flavoring so they could market it to children. Well, the latest evolution of powdered kid-baiting toxicity has begun to appear state-side, and it’s a lot less cute than 3% alcohol lime-fizz.

The Sacramento Bee reports that DEA agents in Yolo County, California recently impounded 3 pounds of strawberry and coconut flavored cocaine. Heavens! Why, oh why, would someone taint their precious stash?

Adding a flavor is seen by Yolo Narcotic Enforcement Team Cmdr. Roy Giorgi as "just another marketing tool."

When the flavored cocaine is inhaled through the nostrils, users say, the flavor can be tasted and smelled. "They said regular cocaine gives a medicine taste in the back of the throat when snorted," Giorgi said. "With the flavored, you get a strawberry taste."


Notice he pretends to have never tasted cocaine… sure, Roy. He knows as well as I do that blow tastes like the inside of the aspirin fairy's bitter butthole after a Campari colonic.

Flavored coke, you see, is one of those substances that’s long been rumored to exist, though its authenticity has been difficult to gauge. Last fall TMZ, Defamer, and several other gossip sites ran a flurry of stories about Hollywood’s obsession with “strawberry-tinged booger sugar.” Their sources suggest flavored varieties of the drug have been around forever, though the Yolo County bust is the only case of a large amount being seized by law enforcement.

Typically you’d think candy flavorings are added to hook kids and teens, as is the case with Booz2Go and “Strawberry Quik” (flavored meth), and they’re usually priced accordingly. Even the newest form of heroin, called “cheese”, while not actually flavored, is being pushed towards our youth with its weird but innocuous name and low price-tag. Flavored yay, however, is fucking expensive:

[For 3 kilograms] agents paid $72,000, or $24,000 per kilogram.
…
The price of the drug is particularly worrisome, Giorgi said. A kilogram of pure normal cocaine from the same distributor cost about $16,000.

If the flavored version is as pure as normal cocaine, it means labs south of the border have figured out how to maintain the purity and add the flavor - something attempted in the past but never achieved.


Even though the price of non-flavored cocaine is dropping, one can only hope the high sticker price of the fruity kind will be an inhibitive factor for our oh-so-vulnerable youth. So unless your kids are celebrities or rich bastards (or sleeping with them), chances are they won’t get their hands on this crap anyway. When the heroin dealers come up with something less repulsive sounding than “cheese”, however, we can all start worrying.

Twelve

Twelve

Bay City, MI
April 2007

JUN 28, 2007 07:13 PM

How did they test it to ensure that it tastes like strawberries?

Best business plan ever though, actually getting paid to cut your product.

flabajaba2213

flabajaba2213

Plymouth, MA
July 2006

JUN 28, 2007 07:15 PM

Wow. Maybe we should get these Mexican drug doctors working on curing cancer...

Tea

Tea

SUICIDEGIRL

Ontario, Canada

JUN 28, 2007 07:35 PM

does the fact that i really want to try the strawberry kind make me a bad person?

JennyLou

JennyLou

Danvers, MA
December 2002

JUN 28, 2007 07:37 PM

Tea said:
does the fact that i really want to try the strawberry kind make me a bad person?



Right?!? Me too tongue I feel guilty having never done anything... I am wayyyy too susceptible to marketing!

SouGei

SouGei

Blackwood, NJ
January 2007

JUN 28, 2007 07:52 PM

This is viral marketing for Quik.

Cattra

Cattra

Anaheim, CA
March 2007

JUN 28, 2007 07:59 PM

HathOriginal said:

Tea said:
does the fact that i really want to try the strawberry kind make me a bad person?



Right?!? Me too tongue I feel guilty having never done anything... I am wayyyy too susceptible to marketing!



+1

Jasper

Jasper

SUICIDEGIRL

I'm lost

JUN 28, 2007 08:01 PM

Tea said:
does the fact that i really want to try the strawberry kind make me a bad person?



I was thinking the same thing. biggrin

ProphetNoise

ProphetNoise

Portland, OR
February 2004

JUN 28, 2007 08:03 PM

Artificial flavoring is never as good as the tried and true original... that is if i really wanted to relive my coke days. Well, the coke part wasn't so bad. The coming down and the next 3 days sucked hardcore. wink

Cate

Cate

SUICIDEGIRL

Colorado, USA

JUN 28, 2007 08:35 PM

Jasper said:

Tea said:
does the fact that i really want to try the strawberry kind make me a bad person?



I was thinking the same thing. biggrin



sign me up.smile

Deny

Deny

USA
August 2006

JUN 28, 2007 09:08 PM

LeMineux said:

HathOriginal said:

Tea said:
does the fact that i really want to try the strawberry kind make me a bad person?



Right?!? Me too tongue I feel guilty having never done anything... I am wayyyy too susceptible to marketing!



+1



+2 biggrin

Marluh

Marluh

SUICIDEGIRL

Kansas, USA

JUN 28, 2007 09:38 PM




Tea said:
does the fact that i really want to try the strawberry kind make me a bad person?







+3

CalvinKaneda

CalvinKaneda

Sacramento, CA
June 2005

JUN 28, 2007 10:49 PM

+4.

However, I live here in Sacramento, and I haven't heard about this in any of the party social circles.


Intresting.

I'll have to look around. wink

filed13

filed13

Kansas City, MO
April 2007

JUN 28, 2007 10:56 PM

So I pretty much agree with all the other ladies on this one.

I do have a weakness for strawberry flavored stuff... Good news is I live in the midwest. Or is that bad news?

DevilsReject

DevilsReject

Cleveland, OH
February 2007

JUN 28, 2007 11:06 PM

WTF?

WHY DO THEY MAKE ALL THE GOOD SHIT AFTER I QUIT DOING IT????

christ, it happens all the time.

deusxmachina

deusxmachina

Honolulu, HI
May 2003

JUN 28, 2007 11:23 PM

You know for 72,000 dollars I bet I could find something better to get fucked up on than strawberry coke. Probably.

ZPO

ZPO

Roy, WA
July 2004

JUN 28, 2007 11:34 PM

Why is this seen as surprising? Controlled substances are a multi-billion dollar industry. Why would the members of that industry not market their products effectively and take steps to address target markets?

deusxmachina

deusxmachina

Honolulu, HI
May 2003

JUN 29, 2007 12:18 AM

ZPO said:
Why is this seen as surprising? Controlled substances are a multi-billion dollar industry. Why would the members of that industry not market their products effectively and take steps to address target markets?



I don't think it was meant so much as a surprise as it was a "*wink wink* strawberry flavored coke?! Hellz to the yah!"

tech29

tech29

I'm lost
July 2004

JUN 29, 2007 12:45 AM

Apple flavoured tobbacco smoked through a pipe is a favourite of mine.. Now where do find a strawberry flavoured coke dealer at this hour tongue

Matthew_O

Matthew_O

Los Angeles, CA
December 2006

JUN 29, 2007 01:38 AM

SourPatchKid said:
WTF?

WHY DO THEY MAKE ALL THE GOOD SHIT AFTER I QUIT DOING IT????

christ, it happens all the time.



I asked the same thing.

imclever

imclever

Kent, WA
February 2007

JUN 29, 2007 01:59 AM

The snozberries taste like snozberries!

+I-lost-count


mmm, strawberries.

Fi

Fi

Australia
August 2006

JUN 29, 2007 03:09 AM

Tech29 said:
Apple flavoured tobbacco smoked through a pipe is a favourite of mine.. Now where do find a strawberry flavoured coke dealer at this hour tongue



Mmm yes....nothing like finishing off the mirror with some tasty weed mixed w/ flavoured tobacco, wrapped in a chocolate/strawberry/vanilla blunt/ papers.........you can then lick off that flavoured paint on that hot girls leg.......life should be full of FLAVA

ps. i'm not smokin the crack

audiophiliac

audiophiliac

Portland, OR
September 2006

JUN 29, 2007 07:08 AM

jimHAK said:
This is viral marketing for Quik.



This is a new definition of Quik!

And coconut flavored??? Mighty fantastic. I'm all for people using coke if it'll help the U.S. and it's meth addiction. People I've met using coke are fun for a couple hours, people I've met using meth aren't fun frown more scary.

Drock1205

Drock1205

Merrick, NY
June 2007

JUN 29, 2007 08:55 AM

Cheese. Ew.

At least call it like, 'Fairy Dust" or something. Mmmmm "Fairy Dust."

RileyStClair

RileyStClair

Los Angeles, CA
September 2006

JUN 29, 2007 09:39 AM


blow tastes like the inside of the aspirin fairy's bitter butthole after a Campari colonic



i've never been able to describe it so accurately.

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