NEWS: Morbid Visions: Death TV is Coming Soon

CULTURE: Morbid Visions: Death TV is Coming Soon

Peel away the sinister connotations movies and metal bands associate with the concept of death and what's left? The painfully slow act itself. Barring accidents and freak forms of expiration, it would likely be a slow descent; an uncomfortable and frightening transition for the one about to succumb and a long, painful process for his or her loved ones. Beyond that, the tedious day-in-day-out slipping away would be maddeningly boring, and certainly not something others would want to watch… or would they? Spiegel Online reports:

To a lot of you the idea is probably a little off-putting, if not downright disturbing, but there's an interesting logic behind EosTV’s impending inception. It seems that Germany, despite having around 82,000,000 inhabitants, has a very low birth rate compared to other parts of the world; last year almost 150,000 more people died than were born. Besides causing a decline in overall population, what this does is cause a shift in the television viewing demographic.

Some of the programming ideas for the channel include documentaries about cemeteries, helpful tips about finding retirement homes, and explorations into the changing ways in which we cope with death, as allowed by the advent of modern technology and the internet. The channel even plans to offer their own modern take on mourning: TV obituaries.

It may not be a necessary innovation, but I suppose someone might be interested in getting teary-eyed over a clip of dearly departed Uncle Fritz. But if I were actually old and ‘on my way out’, I’m not so sure I’d want to sit around and wax depressive watching death all day. The programmers at EosTV are surely aware of that, as there will also be shows about retirement homes, nursing care, and installing a stair lift in your home. Stair lifts, as you may not have known, make for compelling viewing.



Ok, so my idea of “Death TV” may be more akin to “Elderly TV”, though something tells me by focusing a little more on the gloomy side of things EosTV could tap into Germany’s ever-present goth scene, which is very much alive. And now that I think of it, I wonder if the founder of the network isn’t the one with the unnatural fixation on death:

It’s his, uh, breathless excitement that has lead to the inclusion of "entertainment programs" and documentaries about famous cemeteries. But programming aside, when the dirt hits the shovel, so to speak, Germany will have an interesting addition to their cable lineup… and it's one that may be headed to other shores soon.

'Til then, the morbid and the elderly will have to wait with bated breath, contenting themselves with Six Feet Under reruns.

um, neat.

I watched that whole stair lift video...

It's time to go to bed.

when do we get this on cable ?

edit: Heathen_Dave, most definetly ! I was gonna do the same but got tired halfway through...

Germany is so goth.

mmm pure organic fear, that 3am flight or fight reflex full of adrenaline when you realize that the beautiful woman next to you and the great sex you had is just a moment passing by and in the end, which comes to all- well, think what you will.

Badass. I'd watch a channel about death.

Space...the final frontier................



To Die!!!!!

Wow, but the logic behind this whole thing is really sad. Over 150,000 more people died then were born.

I find it very sad that a country with such a rich and amazing culture (not to mention people) is shrinking population wise. Eventually it'll balence out I'm sure but still sad nonetheless.

So this is were all the goths have gone...to Germany....hmmmmm!

Good thing you provided a link to explain Germany. Otherwise, I might not have known what Germany was.

Long live the new flesh!

Just kidding. I fricking hated that movie.

Huh? That's how you look at it. You ask me, Germany is setting a great example for the rest of the civilized world. Think how much we could do for the planet by reducing human population and thereby curbing consumption of resources and production of wastes and toxins.

And why would less people mean a devaluation or disappearance of culture?! I thought culture was about the quality of human endeavors, not the quantity of human beings occupying a plot of earth...

As long as they do not attempt to sensationalize this, say for instance televising executions, then this isn't so bad. Western culture is terribly backwards on the process of dying and on the role the act plays in the larger systems of our world, so if that discourse can be opened up, that could prove beneficial.

Wasn't there a stair lift in Gremlins? Didn't the old lady go flying up the stairs and out a window? People in Germany should see that before buying one. And by total coincidence, Murry Fudderman was fighting the nazis in World War II when he first encountered gremlins.

hahaha

I also provided a link to a description of the german goth scene that's entirely in german. why? I'll never know. the mysteries in my head know no bounds.

That's a rather naive view.

Preservation of a culture relies on at least population growth breaking even. If population growth continues to be negative, the culture could be wiped out by bad things like natural disasters or cultures who have a very positive population growth.

True enough. But I'm not suggesting that population should shrink forever to the point of extinction. I am suggesting that it would be great for the health of the environment (and additionally, for the quality of life of those who are living) if population in the Western industrial nations who consume a disproportionately large share of the world's resources (and output the greater share of pollutants and toxins) were to shrink dramatically.

Conscious intelligence coupled with voluntary contraception could diminish the negative impacts humans make on the natural environment in just a couple generations. Humans, let's face it, have become a parasitic burden on the biosphere, and insofar as the biosphere is a self-regulating lifeform, stand to be purged from the system in plagues and natural disasters.

In the final analysis, I value nature over culture, because nature is the foundation and matrix of life...

Good thinking.

let's hear it for the great psychic tv cameo in the header image! woo!!! genesis p-orridge RAWKS!!!!!!1

I thought the same thing! I have that PTV death's head test pattern stuck on my PC monitor and it was like a good dose of doublevision seeing this blog header!

Awesome! Very glad that didn't go unappreciated.