NEWS: Dane Cook Weeks Away From Being 0 and 2 at the Box Office

Just in case no one remembered besides Dane Cook being generally unfunny the few times he is funny is usually with someone else material which he stole.

Hahah... Agreed.

And yes, he's also a joke thief, incredibly unfunny, and, it turns out, box office poison.

Here is hoping he invests his money poorly and he will be doing Gary Coleman type jobs in 10 years.

Patton Oswalt just sent me this, so I don't have a link. Apparently yesterday Dane subtley claimed Louis stole the bits from him...

Uh huh. "he absorned?" How could be absorbe them when he wrote them first Dane?

What an asshole.

I'm not scientist but wasn't Louis CK's album with the material in question released in 2001 and Dane Cook's album with the stolen jokes on it release in 2005? Seems like there is a bit of a time gap there even if Dane claims he was doing the jokes before he record his album.

Ummm, it grossed 14 million. Maybe not.

The trailer was re-cut to edit out the STAR of the film. It was turned into a Jessica Alba movie because early screeners hated Dane Cook, even though she appears in only 30 minutes of the film. It was also dumped in September. According to the studio, the movie "met expectations" which means it did not do very well. Word of mouth will be devastating. Expect a 75% drop off next week.

These results put Cook in the same category as Rob Schneider, hardly what is expected of the new comedy golden boy. With $20 million dollar movies like Superbad making over $100 million, this is a bad result for Cook.

Ummm, yeah. Look, Heather, despite your er, unique insight into the movie business, the fact is that Dane Cook's job is to headline filler movies and have them make money. That's what he does, and he does it pretty well. He's Jane Mansfield, not Marilyn. Superbad, is a fluke. Every once in a while a cheap movie with no stars makes a lot of money. It makes studios happy, but they don't budget off of that,they budget off of sure things. You might have heard it referred to as track record. They take a stand up comedian, pair him with a chick with a hot ass who can't act, and they gross three times the production cost. That's what "expectations" means. Past performance, plus number of screens. If you want to compare Good luck Chuck with something, try comparing it to Mr Woodcock.

I think, much to your chagrin, Dane is going to be with us for quite awhile.

Does that include comparing Jessica Alba to Susan Sarandon?

Susan Sarandon has an oscar. So does BBT and Stiffler is actually attractive. Despite all this, and while I'd rather sleep with Ms. Sarandon, Woodcock grossed 8.7 million to Chucks 14 in its opening weekend.

40 Year Old Virgin and Knocked up made a lot of money, too. Neither one had capital S stars.

No, they just had the same Emmy award winning producer as Superbad who has a 15 year track record turning out profitable small budget films. So, great, Judd Apatow can turn out three movies in two years with no bankable stars. He also turned out Kicking and Screaming. The fact remains that if you can gross 45 million dollars on a 14 million dollar investment, you will continue to have a career.

Stick to shit you know about, idiot.