NEWS: Girl Fakes Stanford Residence; School Officials Not So Excited

CULTURE: Girl Fakes Stanford Residence; School Officials Not So Excited

Hey, remember that episode of Saved by the Bell where Jessie Spano gets hooked on dastardly caffeine pills, and her big reason for going off the deep end is that she's afraid of getting rejected from Stanford? Thankfully she got the bed rest, counseling, and Zack Morris pep talk that she so desperately needed; otherwise, who knows what might have become of her.

Eight months, people. Eight months. That's almost an entire school year! So far the girl has been identified as a high school graduate from Fullerton, but not a lot has been reported motive-wise. All I can say is she's either a con artist of the most genius degree, or just simply insane enough to be totally confident. I am also amazed at what her dorm mates were willing to believe for so long.

She apparently got into her dorm room every day by climbing through a window, on account of she didn't ever have a key. Because a key was never issued, obviously, but what are her roommates' excuses? Did they think she was just quirky? Kids climb through windows on TV all the time, but it's pretty awkward to keep up in real life when there's a door right there.



The news does not report whether she was intending to go to Stanford and was rejected, or whether this was just a whim. I'm willing to bet it was the former, and the stress of rejection was just too much to take, which is really more tragic than anything. Regardless, the girl assimilated into her college life pretty well, buying textbooks and studying with her newfound friends, but nothing lasts forever, least of all a wild tangle of lies. She is currently under investigation for a nearly-free Stanford education and wanton cafeteria-mooching, and it almost goes without saying, but she must be so... so... scared.

..pfff...
lectures should be open to the public,
but a teacher look at your papers should cost money.

Eight months is nothing, I have a friend who faked being in college for two and a half years. He dropped out two and a half years in and pretended that he was going for another two and a half. He lied to all of his parents, friends and girlfriends the entire time. He even went to graduation and had his parents throw him a graduation party and they bought him an SUV as a present. All of his friends figured it out in the first year or so, so there was this huge elephant in the room for the rest of college. It was awkward.

That is a good point...really i think college should be free...but that is just me...

that is not a bad idea as far as hybrid goes though.

I used to sit in on college classes at UWM myself before i enrolled, but then again I am one of the rare people who cares about learning, not just getting a degree. On that note, if you know what you are talking about from self studing you should be able to just test to get degrees. I mean a evaluation by members of the field by the way not just some multible choice non-sense that proves very little. Barring some few mandertary classes in some fields that are much more critical to have exceptional standards, like medicine. I will stop ranting about it for now though...

with ingenuity like that she deserves an education.

Unfortunately, when dealing with the egoes of the housing directors and dean of students, who in turn have THEIR bosses breathing down their neck about how a fiasco like this could occur right under their noses, the odds of the 80s movie-style "Wow, that was ingenius. We should definitely reconsider." ending to this story are virtually nihl.

It's not just the egos of the housing directors at issue. Those people are charged with the safety and security of every student living on campus. Because they had no idea who this woman was, because she was basically trespassing, they had no choice but to remove her.

This woman could have been anyone. She could have been some dangerous criminal instead of just some funny story.

^ That is what I wanted to post immediately after reading this :-)

was it clown college?

your friend's kind of a dick.

you are so right. if someone wants to learn, they should be allowed.

First rule of grifting: The bigger the lies, the more likely people are to believe. They just cant believe someone would tell such an implausible story.
I refer you to the story ot Count Victor Lustwig and how he sold the Eiffel Tower as scrap metal.
Twice.

Second rule: If you act like you belong somewhere, people wont question it. A slight bluster and a confident demeanor are all the disguise someone really needs to wander unfettered by most 'security'.

i smell a Lifetime MOTW.

"Kids climb through windows on TV all the time, but it's pretty awkward to keep up in real life when there's a door right there."

That's like that Steven Wright joke - "I was born caesarian...I don't think it shows. Except that when I leave my house I go out the window."

Something to that effect.

Yeah, I know.

Stanford sounds like they are really on top of things. Don't you have to fill out paperwork to get assigned a dormroom with a roommate and stuff? They obviously knew she hadn't done that since they never gave her a key.

These people are in charge of a college?

Lesbo Co-Ed and the high school virgin.

Your friend sounds like a self-entitled ass.

It's an epidemic!

Well, and I'm kind of wondering how smart Stanford kids really are if they're going to just let some chick move into their rooms without knowing enough about her to realize that she doesn't actually go to school there. That's pretty fucking clueless. Maybe that school ought to up their admissions standards a bit.

You do realize that everybody is welcome to use the public library, don't you? Furthermore...if you fill out the little form...you get a library card...and can take home books...for free.

There are certain costs associated with the burden of matriculation, though...costs that are not based on learning.

Learning IS free. College, however, is a privilege.

That one wasn't too bright. Physics wouldn't be my first choice of a discipline to fake.