Damn Roomates!

I adore my roommate. She's pretty bad about doing dishes, but so am I, so it's all good.

We haven't had any issues so far. We're quiet when the other is sleeping, we ask if we can have people over (mostly because of our funky sleeping patterns), we haven't lost any mail, we don't have to worry about phone time or messages since we each have cell phones, and we don't fight over the TV.

The only nagging thing is that she leaves lights on as she goes through rooms (and then goes to bed), but I always do a lights-off lock-up before going to bed, so I just sigh and take care of it.

You can say that again.

My roomate sniffs me. Like a dozen times a day. He's a weird boy. He also sniffs my underwear. No kidding. However he does clean a lot and does my laundry. Meh, could be worse. He's sweet, just strange.

I had a roomate that started a fire in the fireplace with my vodka. I dont care how cold it is - you drink the vodka, please do not burn it.

I'm not saying a person is required to share anything, but when your mom is paying for your groceries and your roommates are starving as a direct result of not having food in their bodies, house, or realm of posibilities, then it would probably be in your best interests to give them maybe a pack of fucking hot dogs or two! You might just get eaten pulling some stingy shit like that.

Some guys I lived with a couple of years ago used to steal all of my food and it really pissed me off as they were just lazy bums who couldn't be bothered going shopping...

One day I noticed that they'd started stealing my orange juice too and the carton was nearly empty. I finished it off, opened another, drank a quarter of it and then pissed in the juice and put it back in the fridge...

A couple of days later it was half empty again so I told the fuckers what I'd done. No-one admitted to drinking it but my stuff never disappeared again.