NEWS: Michael Jackson Wants a 50 Foot Desert Robot

CELEB: Michael Jackson Wants a 50 Foot Desert Robot

If you ask me, the headline for this post is all you need to read to capture the hardcore lunacy brilliance of the totally sane King of Pop's completely normal plan.

Shh...you had me at "50 foot robot replica of Michael Jackson with lasers shooting out of it." In a related story, all the wars of the world stopped for a few minutes while everyone tried to stop giggling.

(PointBlank thinks he'd be happy with a 20-foot cyborg. Lasers optional)

this would have been so much better if set to the music from The Terminator.

(and i won't settle for anything less than 30' and 60 tons, with ER Lasers and Long Range Missile racks)

It failed to mention that the lazers would shoot out of his eyes and directly into the crotches of all the 12-13 year old boys in the audience.

dammit, i used to like lazer eyes, i think he just ruined it for me.

PEW PEW!

Yes. Yes we do.

you know, i'd even settle for a giant version of Ultraman that i could control.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

(in Homer Simpson voice..)
ooooh, I thought this said 50-foot dessert robot.

I shall name it: Molestron!

Just when you thought it was safe for desert dwelling 30-Foot robotic children.....

Then again, this could be the start of something I've been waiting far too long for:

You know, I didn't think Michael could get cool points anymore....I guess I was wrong, that's as awesome as it is creepy.

Awesome.

-TM

Noooope, that's not creepy at all..

That's something I would like.

I've actually got one.

It's true.

Easily the best quote of that entire article.

I'm at a loss for words

I guess that's one way to "one up" the Burning Man.

hahaha
..aaaaawwwwwkwwaaaarrrddd...

I think it's pretty much a given, that if you build a 50 foot robot...it's gotta have lazer beam eyes. I mean common.

Oh I'm so conflicted now over which I value more...my love for robots, or my hatred for child molesters...damn you Michael Jackson.

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No no no...Gausse Rifle, ER PPC, and jump jets.

Bah, he totally stole the idea from Spiderbait.

sounds like burning man. except without the 'burning' part. or the 'man' part