NEWS: Evil Teddy Bears Get Kids Expelled Again

CULTURE: Evil Teddy Bears Get Kids Expelled Again

When evil teddy bears attack, nothing good can come of it.

Four Indiana high school students this semester have been expelled for independent study into the possible effects of evil teddy bears attacking a teacher, a fictional character who apparently shares the same name as one of their teachers at Knightstown High School.

The result is a amateur movie titled simply The Teddy Bear Master. The movie is a tragic tale in which a teddy bear named "Puffy Pufferton" commands an army of minions to take vengeance on a teacher named "Daniel Clevenger". A proud parent told a paranoid parent about the movie, who informed the school's administration, Principal Jim Diagostino and Superintendent David McGuire in mid October. When it was decided that no laws were broken by the students engaging in bad plot lines and poor movie making, Clevenger requested police protection. The students were subsequently expelled from school.

It's lawyer time!

Two of the kids have opted to sue the school to gain re-admittance. The Charles A. Beard Memorial School Board recently upheld the decision calling for the expulsion to remain in effect for the remainder of the school year, but the ACLU of Indiana is getting their "First Amendment" capes ready. One of the boys' mother hopes with their involvement the decision will be overturned.

The District Superintendent McGuire stands by the ruling:

Obviously, McGuire was not paying attention when, during the movie, students rescue the teachers from the cuddly-wuddly widdle bears. So really, maybe what he meant to say was "First Amendment, Schmirst Amendment, dude was scared. We had to do something..."

Now, Indiana fans are wondering how, if at all, this will affect Peyton Manning's performance come playoff time. All we can do is wait and see.

congratulations, we're still afraid of children..

Well in this day and age, you can't be overly cautious with these bloody crazy kids. You never know when one or three are going to flip their lids and start poppin' off in the hallways. Having said that, i'm sure that expulsion will do a whole lot of sweet fuck all if these kids infact had murder on their minds. Perhaps a more proactive approach would have been to seek professional (psycological) councilling just to be sure they're not homicidal. Personally, if I were gunning for a teachers head, I would not be sitting at home having been expelled thinking "well, I guess that's that. Foiled again!".

Seriously...it's no wonder kids are the way they are with such top notch decision makers like this school's admin shaping their minds.

I can hear the conversation in the principals office now..." now Jonny, go home and plot, I mean, think about what you're going to do to make this right when you come back from your extra long weekend."

Geezuz.

Those young people should feel blessed, they don't need school anymore anyway. It's not like they learn much anymore what with the constant lowering of the bar for the children to dumb and unmotivated to care about being at least slightly more intelligent than a toaster oven.

At least I can cook with a toaster oven.

Blah, blah.

Another shitty move to help our kids grow sane and normal.

.....go colts?

I really, really, really, really, really want to see that movie ... that is the best movie plot I've heard in a very long time ... seriously ... I'm not kidding ...

Im gonna put that movie on my Netflix list...

1. Do these kids have a history of "causing trouble"?

2. Did these kids actually have a problem with this teacher, or was it just kids being kids making jokes that aren't necessarily "funny" to anyone other than them?

3. Had the "teacher" had confrontations with these kids in the past?

4. If the answer to either 2 or 3 happens to be yes, what was done about it?

Where the hell is the counseling? What ever happened to being suspended to teach you a lesson? What about parent/teacher meetings?

I just kind of think there are some missing pieces here. If, as the parent says, these are, "good kids", who are being EXPELLED for something they did in their free time, away from school, I hope this goes all the way to the Supreme Court. If, on the other hand, they have a history of causing trouble, and it can be proven that this movie was a malicious attack, then they get what they deserved. But come on! They saved him in the movie?! The whole thing really does sound like the teacher should be looking for a new profession.

Did you even read the story?

In the movie the kids SAVE the teacher....duh

Is this thing on YouTube yet? I want to see the Teddy Bear Master!

Side Note:
The Teady bear was named after the 26th President of the United StatesTheodore Roosevelt.

Maybe there is a subliminal message in the film that the current president does not like teachers and it is up to the students to save them

the sad part is i (mostly) agree with u has anyone checked utube for this movie if so link it here

this movie sounds better then 90% of the crap out there right now.

damniest!
teddy bear master please sick the school!

i wonder if this school is anywhere near me?

How about some fucking spoilers next time, goddamnit.

I've been waiting for this film ever since the Summer of '05 when it was in pre-production. I've been an avid fan of Cody Overbay since his early work in "Messing Around With My New Christmas Present: The Webcam Story" and "Dancing on said Webcam and Uploading it on YouTube". And now you've gone and thrashed "Teddy Bear Master".

In the trailers it was implied that the kids were part of the problem, not the solution, and it turns out they must have a change of heart and try to rescue the teacher (played by George Clooney).

But no...

Couldn't wait to tell us the plot twist at the end eh?

You're out of the Film Club.

I'm writing an angry letter to SG.

This is bullshit.

It's about time! If we are ever going to quell the teeming mass of comedic film-making we need to do it at a young. Just think how great the world would be if Michael Showalter and Michael Ian Black had be expelled. I tell you one thing, we wouldn't be in Iraq right now.

And those Broken Lizard guys that did Super Troopers, I heard they were responsible for the extinction of the dinosaurs. Any imagination on the part of children breeds strife and misery, and needs to be snuffed out, just like these devil children's snuff film. And these parents, letting their demonspawn run amok for almost a full year making movies.

My guess is someone smoked a little too much grass back in ol' 1990, WHEN THEY WERE PREGNANT! Shameful.

Freedom of expression? Freedom of speach?

Indiana sounds like a backwards state.

i think this is a repercussion from the students thwarting the Teddy Bear Master....he is enacting his revenge, possessing the teacher AND the principal. the evil Teddy Bear Master cannot be stopped.

or maybe this will all come into play in the sequel: Teddy Bear Resurrection

Indiana is a backwards state... massively. But still, go Colts.

This story should be titled, "Daniel Clevenger Is a Big Pussy."

I wonder what Remo has to say about this.

No, we're afraid of FUCKING TEDDY BEARS.

7th graders are bastards. When I was in 7th grade, my class made a teacher cry, another one turn to drugs, and many subs quit.

But it sounds like these kinds were just minding their own business, making a dumb movie, and being kids.

Well, shit! If someone was sending evil teddy bears to kill me I would be scared too!

You know I was almost expelled once for hiding a teacher's coat and leaving him a ransom note. And they said 'People take these things seriously in the real world.'!

And I said, 'The next time I hear about a coat hostage situation on the news I will remember that.'