Man Hall of Fame

If there was a hall of fame for the most badass of men (which there probably is). Who do you think should be in it?

They could be some badass diesel motherfucker or that suave ladies man or that crazy bastard.

Name 3 that come to mind.

My Votes:

Zakk Wylde

Rob Zombie

Bruce Campbell (Ash in Army of Darkness could get anyone. Those badass one-liners, a chainsaw for a hand and a shotgun, I mean c'mon!)

Johnny Mcenroe (Thats right, the tennis player)

George Jung (Oh yes, the notorious coke dealer)

John F. Kennedy (Marilyn Monroe, need I say more)

Tom Waits.

John the Baptist (as cult leader rather than Jesus follower. Locusts and honey. Voice in the wilderness.)

That guy who wrestled a shark to shore and killed it a few years back because it bit of his 7 yr old nephews arm and he wanted it back. True story, it was in the news.

What's the criteria for "badass"? Like, I'm thinking this...

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

...but on the other hand, Neil Armstrong walked on the moon. And he survived in space! That's kinda awesome and badass.

I need parameters here.

It's all your opinion.

But when I see:



I think badass.

But you could even go with:



It's up to you.

I think there just needs to be a reason behind it. Like showing a picture of some random guy and writing "cause he's my brother" isn't so badass.

WOOPS! The first one was meant to be:

5. Joseph Stalin
Good 'ol Uncle Joe. The shit this guy pulled is staggering. Overthrew the Tsar, united Russia, fended off the Nazis (despite being greatly outnumbered and technologically inferior), established communism as the order of the day in his country, scared the living bejeezus out of the West, and left 43,000,000 dead in his wake. Easily the most prolific mass murderer in history.

4. Franklin D. Roosevelt
During the first of his four terms in office, he pulled America up by its bootstraps through the Great Depression, and made us a world economic power again. Founded Social Security, taxed the shit out of the wealthy, and instituted sweeping work relief programs. Sent aid to war-ravaged England, and after the attack on Pearl Harbor, united the nation against European and Eastern tyranny. Helped crush the Nazis, and okayed the development of the first nuclear weapon, thus ushering in the Atomic Age. And he did it all from a wheelchair.

3. Jenghiz (Genghis) Khan
The first Khan to truly organize the scattered tribes of Mongolia, and lead them to dominate Asia. Founded recordkeeping under his rule, and brought the first laws into Mongol society. Campained ruthlessly against neighboring territories, particularly in the middle east. By all accounts, was a great and civilized leader, despite being labeled a "barbarian" by his enemies.

2. Alexander the Great
The only person in history who came within a hair's breadth of conquering the entire known world. Not only that, but he actually managed to hang on to what he'd taken. He was a gracious and caring leader, taking time to socialize with individual soldiers (especially those wounded in battle), and aranging games and entertainment for his army. But what's really amazing? He did it all before he'd even turned 30.

1. Jesus of Nazareth
No, really. Think about it - here's a guy born 2000+ years ago, who's name is not only widely remembered, but still revered to this day. While he may not have formed an army to conquer the world at the end of a spear, he still managed to form an army to conquer it at the end of a religious text. I can think of no other person in the history of human existance that continues to hold the enduring power and social sway that Jesus does. And if that's not badass (at least in a hisotical context), I don't know what is. And this is from someone who truly cannot wrap his head around the mere concept of religion.

"Then we will fight in the shade."

The guy who cut his own arm off after getting it trapped under a boulder while hiking a few years ago. After a couple of days and no help in sight, he did what he had to do. I think that he is in a couple of those beer commercials with Triple H and Burt Reynolds.

And John Walsh is always badass in my book

Yeah didn't he do it with like a dull pocket knife too?

That dude was badass.

He used his pocket knife. I don't know how dull it was, but it did the trick.

Bartholomew Roberts

Greg "Pappy" Boyington

Jean Lafitte

Definitely a badass. Actor, motorcycle racer and Bullit.

Clint Eastwood - brilliant writer, director and not a bad actor.

Indian Larry - one of the great motorcycle builders ever.

Hugh Hefner - would SG ever be as acceptable as it is without what he did?

Thomas A. Edison... does it need explanation?

Nikola Tesla...


...Bruce Lee...

The Miyamoto Musashi of stare-downs, the Pablo Picasso of itty-bitty cigar smoking, the Cyrano de Bergerac of six-shooting. Zen master of the spaghetti western.



Soul Brother No. #1. The Hardest-Working Man In Show Business. The Godfather Of Soul. Mr Dynamite. A man so cool, he could sing like he was getting punched in the kidney and make it dancefloor gold (case in point: Weird Al's "Living With A Hernia" pays homage to the magic that is Brown's funky agony).



Go ahead: just try and put a lobster on top of a telephone and NOT get sent to the nuthouse. This dude did it, got away with it, worked with Alfred Hitchcock, named a painting "The Great Masturbator", and got kicked out of the Surrealist clubhouse for being TOO surreal.




In a just world, Denis Leary would die of lung cancer and Bill Hicks would have his own incendiary Comedy Central show, relentlessly mocking Bush Junior and using his hard-earned greenbacks to buy cartons of cigs and enough leather jackets to make a PETA activist's heart explode. Instead, mad prophet Hicks is dead and Dane Cook reigns supreme. For shame, for shame...




Great pop songwriter? Check. Ugly as sin? Check. Ridiculiously decadent lifestyle? Check. Told Whitney Houston that he wanted to fuck her on live TV? Check. Had sex with Bridget Bardot AND Jane Birkin, in spite of being ugly as sin? Check.

When I tell people that I'm proud of my French heritage, I'm not talking about Baudelaire and Verlaine and de Sade and Voltaire; I'm talking about Serge, the avatar of pure unrestrained Gallic sleaze.




Socrates. Grand-daddy of Philosophy. Plus, he killed himself without being all emo about it.




Three words: Ready To Die.




The OTHER great fat man in our Hall of Fame. Directed Citizen Kane, Touch Of Evil, F Is For Fake, Mr. Arkadin, The Magnificent Ambersons, and appeared in some mind-boggling foreign booze commercials. He also KILLED in The Third Man. Just try to be half as smooth and sinister as he is in that movie; you just can't do it.