NEWS: Tingotang: New Hope (of Suicidal Tendencies) for Sad Singles

CULTURE: Tingotang: New Hope (of Suicidal Tendencies) for Sad Singles

The Tingotang is a badge for single people. Well, according to the website, it's an "inspirational concept" that will revolutionise your single life. Just wear it jauntily on your lapel, and you'll be able to tell people at a glance that you are single and searching! Thank god someone finally came up with a way to do that - it's not as though you have a voice or anything.



I would like to add a disclaimer to this particular rant, which otherwise may manifest itself--and by extension me--as Bridget Jones's younger and even more bitter sister. The disclaimer is this: I am single, and I am fine. I do not yearn hourly for the moment I can knock all this "work" rubbish on the head and start squeezing out extra people into an already putrid world before curling up into the arms of my hulking lover and feeling satisfied that I am, in fact, a valid lifeform and have the issue to prove it. Not that I don't want kids one day - I do - but it certainly isn't something I have on a big long list entitled "My Life and What to Do When" with a great big unticked box next to it and a hiss of "What good are you!" every time I glance at my own vagina.



Of course, not all single people feel this way about their situation. This is presumably why the rocket scientist behind this latest singles concept (probably some limpwristed geek who came up with the idea to validate his own life and created it in some tiny little office with a sticky-paged Jordan calendar adorning the walls) decided to foist it upon the rest of us as well.



Pardon the crude comparison, but didn't Hitler do something similar to the Jews with a yellow star in 1939? Wasn't one episode of Sex and the City entitled They Shoot Single People Don't They? What are these "inspiration concept" bastards trying to do to us anyway? Turn our lives into one big slutty traffic light party? Because we're all so completely up for it all the time, ten times a day? Please, oh please, stranger at the bus stop, notice me and my single badge. In fact, since I'm single and so are you, maybe you should just take me right now?



Perhaps they should create a few variations. An "I eat dinner alone every night" badge for those who've simply given up hope and are peaking at sympathy fucks until they eventually sign up with a dating agency and have a last minute baby they spend the next thirty years smothering and calling "my little miracle." An "I haven't had it for so long I'm afraid I've healed over " badge for the odd sadistic nymph who finds this sort of game an amusing little divert - similar to the alleged gay man who claims you've "turned" him. Oh, and let's not forget, it's hardly an unlikely concept that a married person might slip on a badge for an evening on the town as easily as they'll slip off their wedding band. And unlike the band, there'll be no telltale tan mark - and it might look a bit weird if you start peering at their clothes for miniscule fabric punctures. Even if you are their wife.



It is hard enough navigating through the millions of men, women and anything in between who it sometimes seems have been placed on earth purely to fuck with your head. But when someone decides to make you wear a badge that tells people just how vulnerable you truly are, that's when it becomes personal. If I see anyone wearing a Tingotang, I'm going to rip it off and make them eat it - see if it tastes better or worse than a microwave meal for one.

hoping that i somehow misunderstood this lame concept i had to take a look at the site. sadly enough i was right...i hate it when that happens. the only phrase i can think of that sums up this idea is 'you gotta be fuckin kidding me...'

thats hilarious. maybe these badges are brought to us by the same people who said "did you see what she was wearing, she was practically asking for it." for people who are mildly intelligent and actually care for substance, they are single because the world is littered with this new trend of pseudo-intelligensia. you know the girls whose face screams "i read plath, i want acceptance but i act otherwise." can we make that a badge?

Whilst i agree that the creators of this probably haven't thought their concept through anywhere near fully enough, i don't think the idea of something to help single people get together needs to be so vocally torn apart. It's good that your single & happy, but i'm guessing that not everyone that's single is as comfortable with it as you. Also, i'm all for free speech & that but comparing this Tingotang to Hitler's actions in 1939 seems a little unnecessary.

I checked out the site to see if some one was that nuts to waste peoples money. Then I noticed it was not in american money. This helped make me feel better (not ment as a insult to other countries, just glad it from another country). Some one had a lot of time on their hands and think this will make them rich. They will probaly score some cash from the desperate but that will most likely be it. I agree that people need to speak up. Question "Isn't this a copy of the friend ship bracelets that are hot with the kids and early twenties.?"

"ain't got..no fucking problem at all"..yep , this is an atrocious idea

Amen

You know, Hitler had "pieces of flair" that he made the Jews wear...

WTF

Yes, it's a revolutionary idea...don't make others actually have to speak to you to find out you're single and desperate...just wear a button so they can avoid you right from the start.