Government Regulation Denies Earthquake its Rights

Yesterday, government regulation and union cooperation with government restrictions thwarted a hardworking earthquake's rights to level Los Angeles.

"I'm just thinking of my little aftershocks," said the earthquake. "What kind of world will they grow up in if the free market is not allowed to build structures we can easily turn to dust? And just think of the effect that will have on the disaster movie industry!"

Local libertarian John Thomas commented "Government regulation of building codes is unnecessarily burdensome, causing problems for private industry, driving up prices for consumers, and not allowing earthquakes to do their jobs. Besides, if the restrictions on free enterprise were removed, people could just walk around after an earthquake, see what buildings were still standing, do some independent research to find out what companies built those buildings, and then only give their business to those companies in the future."

Los Angeles was unavailable for comment.

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!

Well done, Shal.

-TM

Damn you, government regulations! How is Ron Paul ever supposed to convince people we don't need a goverment if you keep working like that!

Blimps aren't affected by earthquakes.

-TM

I bet Tommy Lee Jones had something to do with this.

Too busy reading celebrity gossip columns and doing lines of coke off wannabe-starlets' asses.

Conspiracy!!!! The earthquakes are controlling the government!!!!

The earthquake was also upset that the U.S. Geological Survey, a taxpayer-funded Big Government nanny-state organization, downgraded its magnitude from a 5.8 to a 5.4 yesterday. "This is what happens when you allow Big Goverment to rob you of your hard-earned paychecks," said the earthquake. "An organization dedicated to surpressing the truth! I was a 5.8! The truth must be heard!"

The earthquake vowed to blog furiously about this governmental deception and possibly stand on street corners handing out informational leaflets to passerby.

Ron Paul / Earthquake '08!

"we've been relying on structures for our destructive thirsts for far too long" said another earthquake "we must seek alternate forms and avenues for destruction!"

I hear the disaster news industry has had to outsource to third world countries for large-scale nature-based destruction, since governmental regulations (a.k.a. "violence against the people") have made it more profitable to report on natural disasters in third world countries.

if it ever goes to the courts, Los Angeles vs Earthquake, judge judy can oversee the trial

at a recent summit meeting of destructive forces, it's reported that the glacial party smirked, and even laughed, while being scolded by the wind powers for it's slow movement towards achieving disasters.

Thats what he said!

Imagine how sad The Mayor is for being on vacation yesterday! He missed so much camera time

Shalome,

I think that you are forgetting that we can only get building codes through coercion (armed force by the government). It's slavery, pure and simple.

dear shalome, i love you.

also, did anyone think to ask Atlas this thoughts?

He shrugged.

Awesome

Also, bookmarked.

The Federal Reserve is the cause

Whooo! Bring back the gold standard, melt it down and pour it into the San Andreas Fault. Paul / Gold Encrusted Fault '08!

Jefferson hated banks, FYI.

We should melt down the banks and pour the bank liquid into the fault line!

Very clever and well-written.

I'm curious, though, because it's a trend I've noticed everywhere lately (and this is asked of anyone, not Shalome in particular):

When did libertarians become the new principal targets of mockery? I mean, isn't it a bit disingenuous to dismiss a political philosophy that encompasses a broad spectrum of beliefs based solely on the ideas of its most extreme, vocal, ridiculous proponents? They're not all Ron Pauls. Or even capital-L "Libertarians."

I guess I just don't get it.