NEWS: 2 Days Until The Primary Madness Begins

POLITICS: Two Days Until The Primary Madness Begins

Well, we are officially in the shit. The Iowa Caucus will be held on Thursday. A bunch of Midwesterners will be allowed, for no apparent reason, to have a huge impact on the Republican and Democratic choices for president again. And the rest of the country will have to deal with their ignorant choice for months.

The polls are looking as expected. Huckabee and Romney are neck and neck on the Republican side, while Edwards, Clinton and Obama are pretty much in a dead heat for the Democrats. Giuliani is toast and has been since the news of his extra-marital affair bill paid for by taxpayers story broke.

The attacks have picked up. Mike Huckabee pulled one of the most bizarre and idiotic moves of the campaign yesterday, when he called a press conference to show a negative ad that he wasn’t going to air. Let me just repeat that. He asked reporters to come down to view something he didn’t want people to see. Here’s a tip, Huck, you don’t have to keep flogging yourself for Jesus. He doesn’t give a shit.

Here’s the Huck in his moment of glory.



The reporters obviously didn’t understand why he was showing them something he was not going to show people. Retarded.

Meanwhile, Romney is going positive. And cheesy!



Thanks for turning around the Olympics! That was a big deal for me. Oh, and also, thanks for boiling down what I care about.

Iraq, cough, cough.

On the Democratic side, Edwards and Obama began attacking each other a bit more.

Oooooo, he’s a trial lawyer. Hey, Obama, you’re a politician. That’s actually worse.

Edwards gave Obama a little slap back.

Ooooo, he's nice. Slam! Actually, that’s a politician's way of calling someone a pussy. Although, I can’t really agree with that assessment, because the Obama camp made one of the worst mistakes of the campaign last week, when they attempted to lay some of the blame of Bhutto’s assassination on Clinton.

Uh, what? Maybe wait until the body is in the ground, champ. Meanwhile, Barack’s commercials make him out to be the voice of hope.



Jesus, I almost cried.

Hillary has decided to do the one thing that can really, really help her:
Shut the fuck up. That is what one does when they are an unlikable person.

Shhh, be very, very quiet. And don’t answer questions from the commoners.

You go, girl! Maybe you can get a shrub to hide behind, too. Could you imagine Bill Clinton not answering questions on the campaign trail? But Clinton did release a new ad. It’s great, because it makes me want to punch someone in the neck.



Hey, thanks for fucking over people who made prudent financial decisions and helping the assholes who took shitty loans, you fucking asshole. I appreciate you reminding me why I will never vote for you.

So, there you have it. It’s a five-man race and one of them has a vagina.

A disappointing lot, bye and large. I am hoping Obama will pull it off and get some energy into his act. The Ron Paul/Romney/Huckthingy act would actually be comical if not for the impliactions of any of their successes. We joke about how lame Bush is but forget that he won two elections. Morons are winners, I guess.

Has genetic engineering advanced to the point that we can re-create FDR (or Elanor)?

No, and it sounds like you learned about genetics from G Dub.


Freeze home foreclosures? Are you fucking kidding me? It's totally a good idea for the government to get involved in telling banks that they can or can't have their property.
I like the currently proposed legislation that would keep banks from issuing subprime mortgages. There is no reason that banks should have been issuing $400,000 loans to people that can only afford $200,000. Hows that for a solution? And why the fuck didn't Hillary do it while she was in congress? Oh yeah, she was too busy campaigning for president to be concerned with those clowns in the capitol building.

I really wish that we had a stronger group of politicians to vote for these days...
Edwards seems like the only one that has any kind of conviction these days.
Rudy pissed me off to all hell the other day when he showed up at work and threw the kitchen into a spin by ordering shit for everyone (rich out-of-staters on vacation) who watched him talk, and then completley ignored the riff-raff that work there and made his visit possible.
Fuck.

FTR I am tired of you bashing the Republicans and not saying anything about the Democrats. The only candidate that makes sense is Ron Paul.

Hold me, I'm a-skeered!

Has there ever been a good canidate? Can there ever be a good canidate? No matter who runs, someone is going to find some dirt on them. No matter who wins, someone is going to claim there was cheating. No matter who is president, something is going to go tits-up.

It wouldn't be so bad if we were just fucking ourselves up, but we have this obligation to fuck up the rest of the world while we're at it.

Head asplode....

Clean up on aisle 2! . . . bring a mop

Ronnis Kuccini-Paul for prez!

i hear ron paul has a larger cult.

I can't help but crack up at the Mike Huckabee thing.

Then I remember that he's one of the front-runners, and I start to have a little tear. Just like the Indian Man.

Easy Killer, I'm no physicist and don't claim to be one. Are you an expert? If not keep the jabs out of it.

Sounds like you are as disappointed as I at the shortage of candidates worth voting for. We are all in the soup, again.

I am wholly underwhelmed by every candidate in every party. There is not one single person I can truly back...or get excited at the prospect of their leadership. I'll still do my research, watch debates & try to find who I consider to be the BEST lame candidate...but I doubt I'll find much to be excited about.

Watching this whole circus makes me so grateful that Finland is a small country and that our presidential elections are so insignificant on a global scale. I'd go mad if I had to choose a candidate out of that pack of clowns.

Like watching a car wreck.

+1. I would be basically content if Obama, or Edwards or (let's be balanced here!) any of the soon to be also-rans besides Clinton got the Iowa win and nomination; I would also be hopeful that Obama would return to the tone and content that put him on the national radar to begin with, having weathered a campaign from an expecting-to-to-be-inevitably-annointed Clinton camp that will likely be as bad as anything the GOP throws against him.

And yes, it would be somewhat amusing to watch the Huck and Paul's dueling irrational lunacy, if 2000 and 2004 hadn't displayed the American public's sizable appetite for irrational lunacy in their politicians.

I agree to this one hundred percent. I have been very excited about Obama for sometime now, but the fervor that he once had seems to have died a bit. I am fearful that he is just playing into the set tone of the race thus far.

Clinton is, in my opinion, GOP-light. Like a watered down Rudy Giuliani. Edwards really brings nothing to the table to excite me about his positions.

The GOP race is really like watching a train wreck. Fuckabee and Paul make me incredibly fearful for the future of our country.

Yeah, seriously fuck that. Subprime loans drove the market to higher prices, which increased the need to take a subprime mortgage for a home.

Just goes to show - anyone who actually wants to be president / prime minister / chancellor (delete as appropriate depending upon nationality) is better suited to be lined up against the wall and pelted with semidecayed fruit until they admit their ethical worthlessness.

Still, at least it's better than all the alternative political systems.

Fuckabee!!!

Made my day, Margot (which demonstrates how easy it is to make my day).

Agreed on all points.

I think Iowa has actually had very little pull in recent years .. but it is odd the NH and Iowa .. super-white states start the primary season ...

You're right, I don't know about the rest of you, but a man wielding a corncob has a big influence on my presidential decisions.

I am wholly dismayed at how Huckabee is a front runner and yet has no knowledge of global politics. He knew nothing about the assassination in Pakistan and tried to cover it by saying because of this we need to be more vigilant about illegal immigration because after Mexico the most illegals are from there. Whereas real numbers show they produce the lowest of illegal immigrants.

At any rate I'd rather elect a wood door than any of the candidates. And maybe I'm a pessimist when I think that the hope Americans should have after elections is that we elected the person who'll do the least damage over 4 or 8 years. :-(

God help the foolish.

+1

SEAN 4 PRESIDENT!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L52zTGI_t6k

Every time I watched a Republican campaign ad when I was in Iowa over the holidays (family lives there, mostly) I was struck anew by how utterly divorced Republican values are from mine. Attack ads about Huckabee granting clemencies and not being a complete moralistic asshat on the drug issue (even if he is on others)? The HORROR.

Of course, none of the Democrats ran ads that appealed to me either. Bringing up issues like how shit out of luck people are if they lose their job and then, instead of proposing a solution to that, talking about reallocating corporate tax breaks, as if that alone is going to be enough to convince corporations to come back stateside or addresses the people who are losing their jobs for reasons entirely separate from the work moving overseas. I guess I shouldn't expect much of substance from 30-60 second ads, but some acknowledgement that they have any interest in what I want from them would be nice.