Unless you're crippled, you're probably wasting energy

I'll admit it...sometimes it can be annoying when people constantly harangue you about what a terrible person you are for drinking bottled water, or not eating organic food, or accidentally step on a near-extinct micro-organism...it can get a little preachy nowadays.

A few years ago, I noticed something. I noticed that just about every newer retail store I went in...had automatic doors. You know them...the doors that have a sensor and open automatically when you get close to them. Not long after I noticed them...I started questioning why I use them. My arms work. I'm (for the most part) a healthy young man. Why do I need my door automatically opened for me while I buy junk I don't really need at Target?

Next time you go to a retail store...take a look around. See if you can find a manual door. Oh, those were the dark ages, weren't they? Remember when we had to use physical force to manually operate a door? Thank goodness we've (d)evolved.

I began my one-man rebellion against convenience. I pledged to use the manual doors and take the stairs instead of the escalator.

Do you know what I learned? I learned that while the seemingly physically capable sheep stood in line...waiting to pass through the automatic door....then stood in another line to go up the escalator...I could gallantly stride past them....open my own door with my super-human strength, and master the art of walking up stairs.

Now, I can see if you don't have arms...you wouldnt want to use your mouth on a public door handle...that'd just be gross. Maybe have ONE automatic door...you know, for the cripples like No-Arms McGee who's too afraid to open a door like a MAN.....

Or the plight of Johnny CantWalk with the two bum legs...it can get awfully frustrating having to constantly as strangers for a piggy-back ride up the stairs. HE....can use the escalator guilt-free.

What's your excuse, pussy?

Bah ha ha ! This is awesome.

I have a secret confession.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

I hate people that stand on the escalator or moving sidewalk like they're on a fucking ride.

God bless you in your rebellion. You are not alone.

Word. I cannot stand people who ride trolleys at shopping malls, or those flippant idiots who need to drive two blocks away to the convenience store "cuz it's hot."

the best part is that spending your own energy to do a physical task is called "exercise", and it pretty much totally rules.

But we'll never evolve into a massive-craniumed telepathic species if we keep having to exert our fragile physical bodies by opening doors.

Is that bad?

No indeed.

Funny. My local Target actually does have hand-opening doors, at least to get into the little porch area . . . never understood why businesses need those. It's like they're giving you one last chance to escape their everyday low prices. But I guess our mall makes up for it: It is only one floor, and none of the doors are automatic. Those poor teens actually have to exert themselves to enter Banality Central.

If you notice, it isn't just elevators/escalators/automatic doors. Watch people walk from street level up to sidewalk level: nearly everybody will use the handicap ramp.

Yes, but that's because it's faster and there's no risk of tripping on the steps.

At least, that's why I use it.

Do you smoke organic cigarettes?

Phelps is an ass. He wastes 12,000 calories a day on his vain swimming and gold medals. Those calories could totally be used by starving children in Africa. Stop wasting energy!

I'm curious as to how, exactly, someone "wastes" energy by taking an escalator, since the escalators I've seen tend to be in motion (or not) regardless of the number of people on them.

I think he means the energy we spend pumping electricity through the escalators because people are too lazy to walk up and down stairs. [/conjecture]

I hate automatic doors, but not because they're automatic. It's because they put the sensor on the inside and the outside, and then label the doors "Entrance" and "Exit." If it's going to be labeled "Entrance," it shouldn't fucking open from the inside.

I think the theory is that your hands are full, or you're pushing a cart. almost all the stores with automatic doors that I can think of around here are grocery stores or pretty big retail stores.

that's so that the store isn't blasted with cold air in the winter (or hot in the summer) every time someone goes in or out. it's like a temperature lock. it's actually the same problem revolving doors were invented to solve. how do I know this crap?

what bugs me is how the local version of kroger around here doesn't even have doors, just a big gaping hole in the front of the store, blasting out heated or cooled air all goddamn year. I think once, when it was like -18 outside, I saw them narrow the opening a little bit.

plus, if you want to get into pointless details -- as CE threads tend to do -- the motor has to do more work to move the mass that passengers add.

/derail

Wow, that's a good point.

I can think of a number of reasons for the presence of a great number of automatic doors than manual doors.

1. While your hands may be free when you enter the store, upon leaving you will presumably have your hands full, be pushing a cart, or be otherwise encumbered.

2. The Americans with Disabilities Act requires handicap accessibility.Having automatic doors is more convenient for those with disabilities, and it doesn't inconvenience those without. In fact, it also makes things more accessible to those without.

3. Safety. You're not likely to get shut in an automatic door. Kids aren't going to get their fingers pinched. Collection agents aren't going to slam delinquent borrower's heads in them.

4. Also safety related, in the event of an emergency, all the doors can be opened automatically and set to stay open, facilitating a safe and speedy evacuation.

5. Despite sometimes waiting for people to get through the doors, I suspect traffic flows faster through automatic doors than manual doors.

That drives me nuts too, actually. Stand on the right, walk on the left. Except in places where people not familiar with escalators visit, like malls. Then they just stand wherever the hell they please.

Except, for safety reasons, law requires that it open from the inside.

It's due to a principle of universal design: the solution should help everyone, not just those with disabilities.

I view it as a good thing, myself.

Fuck the ADA. Seriously. Fuck it right in it's crippled ass. My local convenience store has 6 parking spots. Two of them are handicapped spots. Why?

Much like Affirmative Action...the ADA has outlived its purpose. All the ADA does now is make businesses & governments spend a shit ton of money that could be better used elsewhere.

ONE automatic door would more than take care of the handicapped populace at any building.

What really bothers me is automatic paper towel dispensers. They're not any easier to use than the regular types(not the ones where you pump the handle, the ones like upside-down tissue boxes), and they're slower and more expensive.

Edgy. Way to be an iconoclast there, Mr. Trailblazer. But you make a good point, the disabled and the laws designed to protect them are really brining this country down.

sound and fury!

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