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TheCoolerKing

TheCoolerKing

NEWSWIRE

Los Angeles, CA

OCT 23, 2007 06:40 PM





I know FTR linked the earlier, un-cut version as part of a larger Burma piece, but today the official Rambo trailer debuted online.



I'm not sure how the movie will do, but the trailer had to overcome Rocky-esque obstacles in order to succeed. And, of course, it totally did. (Rocky 1-4-esque obstacles, not 5-esque. But definitely 3... um, -esque.)







And here's the unrated one, which is so good, it's actually better than any three other Stallone films. Not counting Rocky. Or, Over The Top. I've seen it roughly two dozen times.







How does it not suck? Yeah, I don't know either. It really should. Completely and without question, and yet... it kicks some dick.



I mean, first of all, Stallone is in his sixties. That sounds made up, right? No, he's fucking sixty-one. Hardly your prime ass-kicking years. Do a search, in the last year, how many guys in their sixties jumped up into a jeep, swung a machete into a dude's throat, and totally lopped the guy's head off? Now add the phrase "while defending the US of A against evil villains." Yeah. Not counting serial killers, I'd be surprised if more than a few dozen accounts popped up. My point is, it just isn't something you do as much, once you hit the big 5-0. It's almost as if those "World's Greatest Grandpa" mugs were built from some sort of strength-sapping ore.



Then, let's face it, appearance-wise, he looks a little like the bloated version of Sylvester Stallone that hit the talk show circuit back when the latest Rocky was in theaters. That's sort of a first. He looks like the actor, not the character. I can't explain it. I mean, Rocky looked like Rocky, but... something's missing here.



Of course, there's also that HUGE WAR we're currently in. It's filled with actual death and actual bombs and people tend to take it pretty seriously. I've noticed that people faced with the loss of loved ones in a war don't often want to see the onscreen exploits of a made-up, totally ridiculous war hero played by a guy who lives in a mansion.



How about the fact that Stallone is no longer a box office heavyweight. I've never been a huge fan but, that was a shock, the day I figured that out. Perusing the aisles of my local video store during the early nineties. Picking up an interesting looking box cover. D-Tox? What the fuck is this? Oh... Oh no, direct-to-video? Not you, Sly... Damn you, God, is no one safe from the fickle tastes of the movie-going public?!



Apparently, none of this means shit, cause that trailer is not fucking around... Holy Hell, let's hope the movie is even half as good...









TheCoolerKing wants to know if "we get to win this time?"



Chopperdave

Chopperdave

Long Beach, CA
January 2004

OCT 23, 2007 08:05 PM

I was going to inform you that you were wrong
til you mentioned that you werent comparing it to the greatest piece of work in the Sly Stalone arsenal

Over the top!


OffBroadway

OffBroadway

Canada
September 2004

OCT 23, 2007 08:11 PM

Didn't they catch Stallone smuggling steroids last year? These trailers bite, and the film will suck. The producers incited the protests in Burma this month to help sell tickets. Fuck this, I'm going to bed.

big_trouble

big_trouble

Ann Arbor, MI
OLD SKOOL

OCT 23, 2007 08:12 PM

He looks horrible. Like an old roadie for the summer tours of bands you no longer care about. Almost a cartoon of the original character. Remember the original story? Good flick, should of left it at that.

PatrickY

PatrickY

Vancouver, WA
December 2003

OCT 23, 2007 08:19 PM

I like Sylvester Stallone more as an old guy than I ever did as a young(ish) action hero. He's reaching out to seize hold of an old archetype that has largely been forgotten in Western pop culture: the old, wise warrior in the autumn of his life.

Really, he's a great fit for the type. He's still got muscles, he's got a gravelly voice, and the face that was - at best - unpleasant in his youth has gained a lot of lumpy character. Plus, he's got a long list of iconic action roles behind him, and that just reinforces the myth.

He's still not a great actor by any stretch, but he's eminently cooler now than he ever was as a 30 year old action hero.

saenze1

saenze1

San Juan, TX
October 2005

OCT 23, 2007 08:24 PM

Oh, my little art film loving fucks, I beg to differ. "John Rambo" will be a ridiculously violent piece of entertainment. Certainly it's no moody, subtle, Wes Anderson think flick, but when shit blows up real good, sometimes it's fun to go pay to see it. null

XamaX_is_Dead

XamaX_is_Dead

La Mesa, CA
March 2007

OCT 23, 2007 08:26 PM

yeah, that unrated clip did kind of kick some ass... i guess stallone is like wine, the older the better... till it turns to vinegar.

KingMike

KingMike

Westfield, NY
October 2006

OCT 23, 2007 08:35 PM

i just hope they don't neuter the final theatrical cut of the movie. leave the gore in!

Razorshimmy

Razorshimmy

Los Angeles, CA
July 2005

OCT 23, 2007 08:51 PM

PatrickY said:
I like Sylvester Stallone more as an old guy than I ever did as a young(ish) action hero. He's reaching out to seize hold of an old archetype that has largely been forgotten in Western pop culture: the old, wise warrior in the autumn of his life.

Really, he's a great fit for the type. He's still got muscles, he's got a gravelly voice, and the face that was - at best - unpleasant in his youth has gained a lot of lumpy character. Plus, he's got a long list of iconic action roles behind him, and that just reinforces the myth.

He's still not a great actor by any stretch, but he's eminently cooler now than he ever was as a 30 year old action hero.



I'm with you on this one.

Formus

Formus

Milwaukee, WI
May 2007

OCT 23, 2007 09:01 PM

saenze1 said:
moody, subtle, Wes Anderson think flick



[/SNORT]

AriesPreppy

AriesPreppy

Santa Clara, CA
September 2007

OCT 23, 2007 09:04 PM

Razorshimmy said:

PatrickY said:
I like Sylvester Stallone more as an old guy than I ever did as a young(ish) action hero. He's reaching out to seize hold of an old archetype that has largely been forgotten in Western pop culture: the old, wise warrior in the autumn of his life.

Really, he's a great fit for the type. He's still got muscles, he's got a gravelly voice, and the face that was - at best - unpleasant in his youth has gained a lot of lumpy character. Plus, he's got a long list of iconic action roles behind him, and that just reinforces the myth.

He's still not a great actor by any stretch, but he's eminently cooler now than he ever was as a 30 year old action hero.



I'm with you on this one.



I'm with you guys on this one. We have to ask, "How many good actions flicks are out there, without the excessive use of CGI?" Ah-nuld is out of the question after T3; guys like Brendan Frasier, The Rock, and Vin Diesel can't even come close to the legend status for "Action Hero" we saw in the 70's and 80's. It's all bullshit now.

So WHAT if he's 60; just means he's the only one who can pull off the character without someone doing a John Rambo prequel.

The sheer decimation of the one soldier off the machine gun was pure genius. But the timing for this and the media blitz with Burma now might be an interesting combination.

gnihk

gnihk

Portland, ME
September 2007

OCT 23, 2007 09:33 PM

MAY 28th! I am and have been so excited for this for like 6 months or so now, every time I watch the trailer I get more stoked to go see this when it comes out. Im really hoping the trailer is seriously just a teaser and not a slightly condensed version of all the awesome parts of the movie.

gnihk

gnihk

Portland, ME
September 2007

OCT 23, 2007 09:39 PM

oh and did anybody ever get to see the integrity-ish hxc band from new hampshire / souther maine / mass : Over the top? good stuff.

Ciroc

Ciroc

Santa Barbara, CA
December 2003

OCT 23, 2007 09:44 PM

Want. To. See.

TheRealTexaSGuy

TheRealTexaSGuy

Tacoma, WA
December 2003

OCT 23, 2007 09:51 PM

That looks so fuckin awesome I don't know what to say.

Drake

Drake

SUICIDEGIRL

I'm lost

OCT 23, 2007 09:52 PM

I see they are incorporating elements from both Predator and Anaconda 2. Wisely chosen!

UnChanguitoFeo

UnChanguitoFeo

Santa Fe, NM
July 2006

OCT 23, 2007 10:05 PM

I don't care how bad they are, if any of the Rocky or Rambo films are on TV I have to watch them. I'm going to have to go see this one as well.

jason

jason

USA
August 2002

OCT 23, 2007 10:11 PM

writer. director. star.

gotta appreciate that.

Andrew99

Andrew99

Ireland
June 2006

OCT 23, 2007 10:13 PM

Rocky is one of the greatest movies of all time and Rocky Balboa was a fine comeback. The problem is that Rambo was bullshit the first time around. There is no level of post-modern ironiy or post-ironic modernism on which it can be enjoyed.
The lesson is ... if you're going to play a mumbling retard, make him a charming chump and not a mentally-ill super soldier.

outryder

outryder

Oklahoma City, OK
September 2007

OCT 23, 2007 10:26 PM

Wow, that kicks ass... I refused to see Rocky Balboa, but now I have to see John Rambo.

Ravnos

Ravnos

Edmonton, AB
OLD SKOOL

OCT 23, 2007 10:28 PM

I just wanted to throw out that I enjoyed Cop Land. I thought that was an under appreciated gem in his career that you don't even need a heaping helping of irony to enjoy. I mean, I enjoyed Demolition Man and Tango and Cash as much as the next guy, but it was nice to see him actually act for once. If only he'd done it more often.

I don't really care either way about this movie, though. Maybe I'll watch it when it inevitably shows up on Spike.

TheCoolerKing

TheCoolerKing

NEWSWIRE

Los Angeles, CA

OCT 23, 2007 11:25 PM

AriesPreppy said:

Razorshimmy said:

PatrickY said:
I like Sylvester Stallone more as an old guy than I ever did as a young(ish) action hero. He's reaching out to seize hold of an old archetype that has largely been forgotten in Western pop culture: the old, wise warrior in the autumn of his life.

Really, he's a great fit for the type. He's still got muscles, he's got a gravelly voice, and the face that was - at best - unpleasant in his youth has gained a lot of lumpy character. Plus, he's got a long list of iconic action roles behind him, and that just reinforces the myth.

He's still not a great actor by any stretch, but he's eminently cooler now than he ever was as a 30 year old action hero.



I'm with you on this one.



I'm with you guys on this one. We have to ask, "How many good actions flicks are out there, without the excessive use of CGI?" Ah-nuld is out of the question after T3; guys like Brendan Frasier, The Rock, and Vin Diesel can't even come close to the legend status for "Action Hero" we saw in the 70's and 80's. It's all bullshit now.

So WHAT if he's 60; just means he's the only one who can pull off the character without someone doing a John Rambo prequel.

The sheer decimation of the one soldier off the machine gun was pure genius. But the timing for this and the media blitz with Burma now might be an interesting combination.


Agreed. Nothing like the aging veteran back for one last shot at glory. Um, though I do like The Rock.

TheCoolerKing

TheCoolerKing

NEWSWIRE

Los Angeles, CA

OCT 23, 2007 11:28 PM

Drake said:
I see they are incorporating elements from both Predator and Anaconda 2. Wisely chosen!


Holy shit... You've outnerded me. Bravo.

fullmoonkisses

fullmoonkisses

United Kingdom
September 2006

OCT 24, 2007 12:50 AM

Coooool! smile

Pwndcake

Pwndcake

Portland, OR
October 2004

OCT 24, 2007 01:35 AM

All I could think about when watching that trailer was Metal Gear Solid 3.

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